Haven’t listened to Emperor since Saturday night, feeling reconciliation right now. First I felt the need to switch to StarkQ but that passed. Then I was feeling uncertain and a tiny bit melancoly but that is starting to pass.
The issue that really shows itself constantly is the social issue. I have to admit that mentally and emotionally I am not living life in a healthy manner. I had an opportunity to hang with some friends on Sunday and I chose not to. What I chose to do instead was watch porn.
Thinking about it now in terms of my job, things are actually going well. Stressful and hectic at times but good and my father tells me a lot how proud he is of me and both he and his partner tell me how it couldn’t work without me which means a lot. I’ve been sitting at this computer typing out my thoughts and thinking about what I need and I decided I’m going to make one last switch to StarkQ. I always said I was introverted but I was lying to myself. I am anti-social and I am paying the price mentally and emotionally. I need to start working on this now.