Well, after a few months I just realized what I always denied of myself.
Today I realized that my social life really is lacking. My last post involved to stay on my studies and then work on my social life. But that’s always the mask I used to deny my poor social skills & life.
Or maybe they’re sub par (my skills). One main fear all my life is to be judged, or shunned.
Thankfully, it hasn’t happened, however I do wish to expand my contacts, have friends, a group.
Lone wolf all my life. I never had someone close as a friend. Never.
Feeling frustrated and bitter. It’s like a huge mental block that tries to prove that as I’m good at getting excellent grades, this is more than enough and that my friends are “inferior” (That stupid mentality of “They just don’t understand me”. That’s my excuse to never get along and to just focus on school work.
I do have some guys who talk, but never more than 10 minutes, just some small jokes or chit-chat, nothing more. Also since I’m a bit on the chunky side, frequently my mind thinks I’m really unattractive to women. Social anxiety and fear of rejection fills my mind everyday when talking to either males or females.
My classmates often see myself as a good student, hardworking and with a bright future ahead. But really none of them had even talked to me just to chat, usually it’s just to ask about some doubts in school subjects or other things related to projects.
This makes me feel not appreciated, or maybe in the sense that they’re fine without me. I want to change this. Being a social alpha, always relaxed, with good friends.
That’s where I’m stumped. My current stack is:
Ascension v2 (5x loops)
Limitless v2 (2 loops)
I tried listening to Daredevil, but I change my mind quickly and I haven’t listened Daredevil for at least a WEEK. Usually at the second day I swap it. Because my mind says “Don’t change yourself for that, that is needy and absurd” Or something like that, feel depressed afterwards.
My goals (First time I choose them) are:
-Get a group of like-minded friends
-Be relaxed and kill social anxiety
-Get attraction from females
-Improve social skills
-Be a Social alpha
Since I really don’t have any trouble with good grades, I can live without Limitless
What stack would you recommend me? Any form of help is appreciated…