Need Depression stack suggestions

Questions and Comments
#1

So I’ve got what I can only describe as depression which only comes up when I have to work my day job.
Like, even right now, as I sit here, I should be taking customer’s calls.
I haven’t even clocked in yet. I used to think this was “work-related anxiety”
I’m on LexaPro for it.

I’ve been off the LexaPro for 3 weeks now…self-experiment. Mostly don’t feel any better or worse, though my swings are larger. (Not bipoloar. The pill does seem to make me “nicer” in my daughter’s words).

I’ve been thinking about if Quantum Limitless ST1 could help since it has the “reset” and “balancing” aspects. I don’t expect subs to fully fix my issues.

But would stacking QL1 with Rebirth be a good start?

Or QL1 and Regeneration?

I only have Rebirth so far, so need to come up with $$$ to get QL and/or Regen if I go this route.

I’m just tired of feeling worthless and valueless due to not being able to just “force” myself to “just do it” and work my expected shifts.

QL seems like a great start, but I’m open to suggestions.

I read about @BLACKICE’s results with the “Halcyon” custom…and may get that once I have $$$ for a custom again. That one sounds amazing.

EDIT: I am going back on the LexaPro starting today. I was on 10mG but will ramp it up slowly.

5mg every other day for the first week or 2. Then 5mg daily. And will then work up to alternating every other day between 5 and 10

Until I get up to 10 daily.

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#2

I don’t normally offer suggestions, but I’ve previously experimented with the following stacks:

  1. QL ST1 + Spartan
    Spartan adds mental fortitude. It might not make you any happier, but it may help you achieve a better emotional balance and greater resiliency with your emotions. I was also exercising daily, and that helped a lot.

  2. Khan ST1 + Regeneration + Rebirth
    This brought up a lot of stuff, I often alternated between feeling good and going through emotional upheaval. A powerful healing stack, but be careful with it. My current journal details my experiences with this.

  3. My custom “Renew”

Renew has been exceptional for me in improving my mood. But obviously we’re all different, if you go with a custom use your own intuition to guide your choices.

Good luck.

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#3

Looks like I have another journal to absorb :). Thanks @bujin!

#6

do you like the work you do in any capacity, or feel it has a future for you?

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#7

Not in the slightest. I’m doing this (as much as possible) while I get my empire going. Currently building up my presence again in the hypnosis and hypnotherapy space. A bit slow-going but making progress.

If I were to come into an assload of money (however which way) I’d quit without notice.

<Long story) The company came very close to firing me 2-3 years ago over something someone allegedly told them I said. The company (in the form of a manager I now avoid as much as possible) said that they were going to “allow” me to stay in their employ. Ever since then, I’ve had this overwhelming desire to put them all in their place. </long story>

So once I feel like I’m in a comfortable position to do so, I’ll give them as much notice as they were going to give me.

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#8

that was my guess. It sounds like ‘status depression’. Being in a position you don’t want to be in, feeling trapped, needing to be avoidant, and no future there.

Are you looking for replacement work, alongside empire building? I’ve been in similar positions before and its a huge life suck, and in retrospect despite not liking those jobs, I didn’t get out nearly soon enough.

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#9

Not really. Tired of the job hunt and all that shit. And I’ve used that excuse of “I’m too tired after work to do anything productive”…I gave up basically all TV watching (not consciously) a few months ago. Been working mainly on my empire-building.

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#10

So do I get a design royalty or… lol, jk. I’d be honored if someone else liked Halcyon enough to replicate it. :sunglasses:

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#11

Back in college a friend had a summer job as a telemarketer, and he hated it but needed the money. He had a very interesting approach to dealing with it, which probably wouldn’t work for you as-is, but maybe some inspiration.

He would pretend to be someone else when on the calls, so if the person got mad they weren’t mad at him, they were mad at whichever character he was portraying… basically compartmentalization in his brain. He got to the point where he was doing voices for the characters too, with different accents. He only got found out when he was rather exuberantly speaking with a customer in an over the top Jamaican accent (for the record, he was not from Jamaica… distantly of French descent, if I recall correctly) and an actual Jamaican coworker came rushing in to see who the new guy was.

For some reason that didn’t go over well with HR… :rofl:

That aside… perhaps a less obvious persona mindset could be used?

Feel free to ignore every word I’ve typed, I’m one of the more introverted people I know… most people set up their communications to make themselves reachable, I set mine up to make it more difficult to get hold of me. I personally would go nuts having to speak with customers, even if they were only calling to tell me how much they loved my product. My company does get emails like that, and I still told our customer service people to not bother me with it lol…

Anyways… carry on!

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#12

Voices would def get me in trouble at this job. I asked a manager once how s/he dealt with the customers back in his/her day. The advice? “Pretend like you’re a voice actor and just put in the best performance you can.”

Of course, this is the same manager who called me on a day off accusing me of the stuff in the “long story” mentioned above. So I discount anything that one says anymore.

I have tried all my usual tricks at this job I used at others before. I just can’t wrap my head around the idea of the kind of work anymore.

It’s a rarity for me to even work a full shift because this depression (or WHATever it is) kicks in. I guess it can’t be actual clinical depression if it only happens while doing this particular work. Not sure what else it could be though.

#13

I used to work at a Capital One vendor site in Idaho back in 2010. I’d use inflections like as if I’m Jamie Smart (NLP guy) talking. It helped me do better.

I’m at the point now that I want to just STOP trying to push my square peg into the round hole…and just want to make my own fucking square hole that has a perfect fit.

I’m getting older and I’m done. Just tired.

#14

I wouldn’t use any drugs but go for Sanguine and Tryptophan to regain the balance. Apart from that you could consider running Regeneration since it deals with many types of inner issues like anxiety and other emotional/psychological barriers.

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#15

Be careful with Khan ST1, not sure if it’s a good idea if your already in a depress state :sweat_smile:

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#16

@Vesper posted a depression post a while back so my advice is the same for him as it for you. For me personally primal helped so much on my outlook on life and made me very optimistic. My mantra on primal was all is well and I was living that on primal. I was singing, dancing, really connecting with nature. I love primal Q. On the old primal I couldn’t handle the sexual urges, I felt like a sex addict. Primal Q is smooth and does wonders for your emotional well-being. I think it’s the sanguine in primal that makes you feel good but I’ve never experienced that state With sanguine alone or the ultima version. Maybe I’ll run sanguine ultima more to figure it out.
Also if you could find a men’s group, virtual, phone, or in person where you can talk to guys is important especially guys who are going through what you are going through or went through.

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#17

As an update to anyone following this thread still, I’ve since left that job.
I’m currently doing deliveries for Uber Eats. Less stressful than the former job, though even this has its own stressors.

But the fact I don’t have a set schedule? That helps a lot. I took a 2-3 hour lunch the other day and still came back and made $200 for the day.

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#18

I missed this original topic, but I really relate to what you said in your first post.

Let me ask you something. Did you find as your fear diminished in general your desire to do work for the company shrank? This is what’s been happening to me. When I first started I was in a panicked frenzy that I was gonna get canned because I was incompetent so I overdid it. As the fear diminished I realized I didn’t give a single shit about the job and I had no desire to pour an unnecessary amount of energy into the company. Im not a slacker but do I go above and beyond? Hell no not anymore.

So I’ve dealt with depression. But I’ve also realized what an absolute waste of time my job is in the grand scheme of things. And once the veil is lifted and I realized how I was just operating from this high self worth = high productivity mindset, I just felt like telling everyone to fuck off.

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#19

I never fully got over my issues with that job yet. I was on a medical leave for stress/anxiety related to the nonstop barrage of customer calls. While on the medical leave, I decided not to go back.

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#20

Are you saying there wasn’t an overtly sexual vibe to Primal?

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#21

Good idea. No job is worth that shit. Hope you find something better.

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