My Emperor Journal


#21

Even though this is true I think there is no better way to live life than to enjoy it.
I mean, comeon. When you really think about it, we guys here work our asses off and it pays off. It just needs a bit of time sometimes and we should not forget to enjoy the process while following our dreams.
Everything will pan out. We just should relax a little bit more and trust life.

Sorry, just wanted to post my thoughts on this, as I recognize myself in your thoughts.
Keep it up!


#22

I agree with both of you, and we are working hard, so might as well enjoy the journey and the process.


#23

Day 11:

I think today kicked in the Emperors “If you are not gonna do anything I will make you feel bad until you start doing something” module. I felt really bad about not doing anything meaningful and sadly
I couldn’t cope with the feeling and ended up failing my nofap challange, luckily I managed to not brake my no coffee challange.

I am in my early twenties and live with my parents so I get quite often compared to other people of my age, usually I end up on the lower half. Today once again I got compared on my social life, and I got really angry(this isn’t unusual this is my basic reaction), The motivation to prove myself came up (nothing unusual aswell) but somehow it felt different. Like “you can’t just humilate an emperor” kinda feeling. It felt quite nice. I will work out some ways to develop my discipline. Sadly I know I could live a life being looked down upon, I hope I will make a change for the better asap.


#24

Day 12:

I got told a lot that I look really sad and tired, but I wasn’t sad or anything similar. I just felt that anything that would happen is just the natural older. I didn’t feel intense emotions through the day I was calm, I didn’t have a care I was still like water.

Also I managed to make around 30 cards yesterday. It took more effort than the previous 100.


#25

Day 13:

Today I have an ache in my left ear. I had already 2 times with my right ear. I hope it’s the same and it will go away after a good nights sleep. The ache comes up suddenly at random intervals. It’s a little bit different when I had it with my right ear that went away more quicker, also it’s mostly my fault I have listened more than 50 hours in the last 30 days and probably my ears haven’t adjusted yet.


#26

You probably listen to the ultrasonics at a too high level


#27

no I only listened to the masked version. Also on speakers so I don’t know how I got there :smile:


#28

Update:

My ears got better after sleeping but the ache came back after 4 hours of listening. I won’t listen to subs till monday/tuesday it should be gone by then


#29

Hm this is rather strange, but I think I experienced the same. It goes away eventually, just be careful with the ultrasonics


#30

If it is an issue you encounter with masked version maybe try ultrasonics. I have a mild headache with masked sometimes


#31

Maybe it is the water-sound itself that causes the headaches. This makes sense when you consider living in a noisy environment, where your brain is stressed out anyway because it doesnt know what to pay attention to and what not.


#32

Yeah that’s my best bet to. Actually I live in a quiet environment so I guess listening to something loud for longer periods of time suddenly has it’s drawbacks.


#33

Day 14:

It seems my ears got better. I went back to my college dorm, so my listening time will go down to around 6-10 hours depends on how I manage my day.

I managed to do quite a lot of cards in the past couple of days. I am around 60% done from the inital 5% that I have been 2 weeks ago. (that’s only the cards I haven’t started studying yet)

On a personal level I think I am more distant from others than usual. I have to make an effort to continue a discussion with someone on an irrelevant topic, and I don’t find myself concerned when someone talks to me. I got responses that I make them feel bad, I guess that’s the vibe I give out now.


#34

Day 17:

I had to switch back to ultrasonics it seems my ears have developed a sensitivy to the masked track, also it seems I can hear the ultrasonics with my right ear, so it’s kind of fun when I put it on my left side I don’t hear anything.

On another note I don’t feel any different, nobody told me in the last week that I am different not even those who I haven’t meet in more than 3 months.

I don’t have motivation to do many things. I started to procrastinate again, started playing mobile games on my spare time.