Missing feeling of acomplishment

Questions and Comments
#1

Hey guys (and gals),
I am struggeling with what I would call a “missing feeling of accomplishment”.
E.g. I turned a lot of my life around the last weeks. Since a week I am hitting the gym again consistently, doing yoga again consisitenly, staying away from AI and to much binge watching. And somehow I cannot mannage to feel good for those achievements.Allways more. Allways the next step.

Underneath there is a big wish to be seen, and I have allready recognized ths comes from early childhood neglect. Allways trying to be seen my mommy and daddy. I have played this patters out with friends, theraphists, spiritual teachers…and yet…I know. ThatI want to become a man who is able to give myself that feeling. There is that emptiness somewhere in my belly…and I dont knwo how to fill that. How to feel good about myself.

I wanted to ask how other have managed to cross that barrier and became man who are able to validate themselves. I am tired of looking for it in the outside. Be it from Sudo parent figures or partners. How to let go or conquer this pattern?

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#2

Have you tried one of the following?

  • Love Bomb (for self love and letting go)
  • Heartsong Stage 1: Attuned (for self love)
  • PEACE (for letting go)
  • Primal (for making your own definitions of what success looks like)
  • RoS (for downloading your soul’s perspective on life)
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#3

I tried. Yet somehow as soon as I switch subs it fades.
My KB4, Lovebomb, Inner Voice, Gratitude EMbodiment (+More) Custom gives that, yet it fades so quickly.

#4

A few things that might help:

  • Community: A found family can fill the void a biological family leaves behind.

  • Volunteering/mentorship: Become the support you wish you had. Over time, you start to embody that internal validation while doing good for someone else.

  • Goals outside yourself: Pursuing goals with a broader social impact can help you connect more deeply with others and feel a greater sense of accomplishment. The gym, yoga, and cutting back on screens are great wins, but they’re all about improving yourself. Those wins can start to feel empty once you stop seeing immediate results. When you help others, you get to see the effect it has on them, and that sense of accomplishment tends to last longer than a personal milestone.

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#5

Thank you.
That actually sounds good and helpful :+1:

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#6

It’s really just a skill, it’s probably one you missed out on due to childhood neglect.

Start small, acknowledge your achievements, tell yourself you’re doing a good job even if it doesn’t feel like it. That validation needs to be practiced internally. A part of you is seeking it and another part of you can provide it.

You just have to decide to give it to yourself and take action towards that. It’s probably not gonna be easy and it’ll feel wrong. But stuff like this, the reasons why you’re like that are less important than moving to where you want to be. A lot of the times missing these key foundational things can make it seem like our problems are more complex than they actually are, it’s just the aversion to being kind to ourselves or treating ourselves with compassion.

In short, your pattern of experiencing emotional neglect has now caused you to neglect yourself. You have to break the cycle internally.

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#7

Everyone here has given quite credible advice, and as what @Fractal_Explorer has says, there’s no way that might necessarily be easy.

It might be a good idea to re-add PEACE to your stack to create a baseline where you feel whole, even beyond validation.

Then use GLM to source validation from within. Before then bringing in a heavy hitter like LB.

Either way might probably require a quite a bit of time to work.

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#8

Also a good single title to work with is always a great option. I’ve been running seductress and just the scripting in that alone to build my self worth has been doing more than a huge stack. Sometimes I think titles with more broad scope and less depth can help a lot by touching on all different things and help you focus outward if you’re chronically inwardly focused.

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#9

Yeah…this is what I was curently trying to achieve with Paragon:Sleep and WB. Not really looking for the dating aspect currently of it, mostly lookign for physical shifting and reality alignment and that feeling of inherent worth. Getting out to the gym and building my body up…in the past I had very impressive results with it…

I guess this question here is allready the process of building all this up.

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#10

I just started paragon sleep too lol, so we’re kinda on a similar road. I get it.

I think you’re right, when stuff like this comes up and becomes the center of focus it’s usually an indication something deeper is being worked out. The more movement, the more stuff below gets kicked up to the surface.

#11

If you are looking for a sub recommendation a great fit for you could be Hero Origins.

There is a good amount of physical shifting in a way that helps you use you’re body in a practical manner.

If I where to describe it in one word I would say its the “fulfillment” subliminal. There is a great aspect of mastery in whatever you do that is incredible and makes you feel great about yourself. Along with almost a feeling of invincibility.

Whats so good about it though is the virtue scripting. Truly living aligned with powerful virtues gives you an incredible sense of inner worth. Not acting virtuous because its convenient but because its who you are. Along with the inner strength to back up these virtues even when it is difficult.

From the origins copy: