Melior's New Dawn

Journals - Major Programs
#21

Played dear oh Dear khan st2

First I feel the urge to run from myself while being half into the loop lmao

I stay put go through it and relax and focus on whatever I’m working on

Ahhhh I could feel my body producing more heat on the spot it was something

I feel that actions aren’t stopped by procrastination or lack of energy, they’ve become natural, things I just do as breathing

I feel confidence and strength

Manifestations aren’t waiting
I’m currently exploring the work market and something like 2-3 job applications just in the field I’m looking for has popped up only 1h after the loop

They don’t Know it yet
But they’re looking for me

Those are definitely the first breathe of the sub so it explain why they’re so good that fast

Also tried something to help assimilation
Let me explain :

1 min LBFH
15 min Khan st2
1 min LBFH

Still need a lot more time to see how it carries on but I feel I’m into something with that love sandwich method

3 Likes
#22

Yesterday I didn’t felt especially much of anything

Except that if I look back I was wellll above my usual productivity level

Plus by quickly going outside to prepare myself for today I observed how a girl that I thought was cute
Just litteraly kept doing quick glance at me, started twisting her hair, criss crossed her leg etc, etc…

If Khan doesn’t make me aware when someone is attracted to me, it make sure that the gestures are ones I know :joy::+1:t2:

Also wtf for the first time in my life I dreamt I was at some work meeting into the fiel I’m looking at RN and it was a presentation to encourage investment, was very vivid

I feel this dream helped heal some of fear related to work I had, like it’s not so bad init?

Now start my period of posting my CV’s and job hunting, period prepared the last month, let’s see how it goes

1 Like
#23

Had yet another vivid dream except that this time it wasn’t even close to be about work, was just damn sexual

Like wtf level of vividness, like a scenario going on except a bit faster

If I have another one tonight I’ll consider that I’m still processing the new script and won’t play the second loop tomorrow

Today I felt quite confident happy, easy going
Well just good in a lot of ways

Also I just can’t stop doing stuff
Somehow if there is something to do, or before sleeping that I know I should do someday
Wait a minute?! Someday??? Pfffff!

More like when you wake up dude!
I either just feel an urge to just do it or things happen and I end up needing to do it anyway :sob::joy:

It’s a blast
St2 I luv ya

Can’t wait to see how it’ll goes on in the work field after 2-3-5 loops etc

1 Like
#24

It’s in the details

Yesterday went out doing some basic grocery shopping

And gently heard ‘’ excuse me’’
Not once but twice from two completely different person

I never hear people gently trying to pass ahead of me, it’ s a nice change

OH…
Just had an insight rn
Is that… Respect ?
Bro I wasn’t aware it could be that way just for that

Plus yesterday saw that quote : you don’t earn respect, you earn disrespect
Wich simply means that respect should be the baseline for everyone not the other way around

#25

I’m going to stomp & crush my goals for this year
Or eat them like this penguin :penguin:
:muscle:t2::triumph:

#26

Having an easier time talking to people in general

Love the energy, I am doing so much more stuff
What a blessing not to feel exhausted at the idea of doing something

It’s even better, I just seem to not be exhausted at all, even for hard work in nature for hours, dripping in sweat and mosquitos

Crushing what need to be done
Enjoying getting forward

Having great mental images about the future
Knowing that for sure I’ll make it
And I’m getting there actions by action, manifestations by manifestations
Day by day

I feel like I can conquer the day
Throwing myself out there
Everything is doable, nothing is too far away

I’m surprising myself
OH man I love it!

2 Likes
#27

I’m noticing that the aftermath of the 3rd loop is usually the lowest low the sub creates in me as an answer of the change happening

I always feel like ‘’ brah I ain’t going nowhere or feel like doing anything ‘’ on the days after the 3rd loop of most subs, even LBFH

But right after, from the 4th loop and so on
It only get better in temr of ‘’ feeling great’’, I don’t experience anymore the lows

I guess my mind adjust itself to the new wave and the new me the most during that period

Also I’ m still crushing at doing tasks
Interviewer for a formation said that I’m probably a really good candidate for that formation and since I look eager to progress, that if I’m okay with it to receive a call from him next week to see where I am

Gotta say I didn’t planned to get into an interview that day, I was attending an information seance, but I let the flow of things do it’s stuff and improvised the interview lmaooo

Still prospecting agency & enterprises and preparing personalized Cv and whatnot

Feels tiring but it’ll be worth it
It helped me look apart so far and put me in great light

Also I’ve reached a point where I look for important task to be done but I’m reaching points of ‘’ Well I think I have to wait now’’’ ‘I think I’ ll unwind a bit then’’’ ‘Is there really nothing more? Feels weird’ ’

I’ m now in a phase of I still do what I gotta do but it doesn’t feel like I’m doing everything I can yet I am

My brain looking to go beyond the actions I’ve taken to take some more, but I’m a bit without a clue lol

1 Like
#28

I’m feeling worth of anything

I feel worth of good things

I feel like I can undertake anything, one way or the other, I’ll make it

Khan st2 is really great, great is an euphemism TBH

Only been 3 loops
If I knew I would’ve went for it rather than wasted
Oups my phone just changed the term Wanted by itself lmao no joke, well at least that’s how I felt on it, even after 6-7 month under different period of time

Now I feel that my worth is backed up somehow confidence is rising at light speed, especially since I’m taking so many actions now

Just a matter of time

Expect this journal to go silent at some point lmao, if it does, you’ll know I’m too busy enjoying, working and eating life from every corner

Khan something any men with any little desire to make their life a real dream must play at some point

No just play it don’t wait too long, be sure to have some experience with recon, and still taking actions and you’re good to go

No need to overdo it either, I’ve barely played 3 loops in what 10-12 days, I don’t even know

You khan only understand by walking the path
I gotta say that at first I did snob a bit that title when I was more about spiritual development, but now I see it, how liberating it can be

The best magic is confidence and actions
I tell you

Start small if you want but start anyway, next few days add more actions, next week, more thought about how you can act further and putting it into even more actions

Do it do it do it
And so your will be
The world is perfect as it is
I see it

No more running away into ether or whatever
I feel blessed to be able to even have that stuff on my phone

Transformed me from a heavy procrastinator without goal, without fire, without energy, to a freakin’ dude that just go at it, from an introvert, to whatever I am what I am f introvert f extraverted, I do, I talk, I try, I act, and that’s all I need

The sub can’t make you walk, but if you do just that step, bro you won’t be able to stop

Honestly I know it’s brutal but I feel myself transforming from a depressive autistic guy to an actual healthy human being

It’s taking some time, some actions, quite some recon too, but it’s doing it’s thing

4 Likes
#29

Time to change that damn penguin pfp :joy::penguin:

I’ll see what I find, don’t know when tho

#30

#31

Today I gotta say
That somehow I might have had a healing dream?

Also I’m starting to get sick, litgeraly

But it’s the kind of dream where I gave myself up to a fear I guess
So to say that it was unpleasant is also an euphemism

But somehow it feels less in my head now?
Is it? Khan st2 does that kind of things? Or was it The few mins of Lbfh?

#32

I’m having a sort of important moment

A sort of realisation
I’m hiding behind subs

Although I’m taking a lot of actions with them
I think I 'need to prove to myself that I can make it without anything but me

It’ s what SE seems to guide me toward
So I’ll go silent for some time, who knows when I’ll come back

Time to prove to myself that I am something
Taking a break at subs for a while

I think I’ll come back to make myself a biggus dickus v2 or just have some fun with a sub every now a’d then but stop taking it so seriously like a command and having hard schedule and yadi yada

I’m having too many things to work on RN and need free headspace or I’ll burn myself out

I think it doesn’t suits me well to have that rigid use of such a piece of cake

1 Like
#33

Recon got you??? I felt really similar to you at a lot of points during K1 and K2 (so far). But you gave up on it???

#34