This is the common theme for me with Khan. People need to read this twice because it is so much this and it is more deep that people may think.
I mean.
I said before I am on a furious ascent. Then on a single day a few days ago, after my first ever TV interview, I got into a car accident. I came out safe but my car is damaged in a few ways. Then I met with a politician, and I got crushed and ridiculed by him, for no real reason. Then my car brakes went off while it was parked and went into a wall, damaged wall, double damaged car.
I think I stopped there to understand what it could mean. I was upset for half a day then moved on. Brushed it off. I fixed lots of the issues and manifested new opportunities again.
I think I stopped there and thought about real life Khans.
All have face huge issues, life altering drawbacks, and they could have feel shame, maybe they did but it did not stop them. They went on and succeeded. This is so much where I am now.
I dont even know if it is easy, or if I am used to the emotions and feelings of the battle. I know I canāt or mustnāt loose. I donāt stress it. I care about the outcome somehow. But I know I will make it. Yet I am tired. I am feeling all good all bad emotions I am tired happy horny sad upset down. But it is not like before, because like Conan I always go back on my feet. I was looking for easyness with Khan, but thatās not it yet for me. It is different. How can I say? It is like I put my hand on fire I feel it it is painful but I donāt cry and it doesnāt matter.
I am the leader yet I have so much uncertainties. I thought at Khan level I would know everything. But I donāt know everything and my team needs me. I am scared sometimes, well not scared but uncertain. Yet once again, by the end of the day I manifest a magic solution.
My goal is flamboyant. I am amazing. What I am doing never someone has done it. I am so proud of myself. No idea how my life is going to be in two weeks once the festival I organise is done. My network is like expanding tenfolds though still at state level, lol. But yeah.
Additionally I see myself handsome now, for some reason. Like on Wanted Black. Not sure why, this is new with Khan for me.
This Khan ST4 is way better than OG Khan ST4. I mean there is so much growth in this itās crazy.