yes,
thats why i moved to titles like ascension or emperor, i knew that i will find friends once i work on my passion and my purpose, and that social skills are important (like from stark) but are not the main attractor to those souls that i desire to have friends with.
i know what archetype i really want and desire and that would improve my life 100000% if it works, like it would literally change everything
but its really tiring and exhausting to lets say run a title for a couple of months and not see the improvements you wanted to see ,
im not talking self sabotage results, of course im not gonna be an emperor within 3 months, but at least i will see the push that lets me know that its working and im progressing how i should be
one of the most things i hate is not seeing progress actually, i think every human has this too, like in the gym for example. i have a small stomach from a surgery ive done -gastric sleeve surgery- when you lift weights you have to eat amounts of macros to build muscle mass, its a must
i sometimes cant eat well enough in a day due to my stomach size, it hurts to eat sometimes , i end up eating for 2 hours or something on a meal , the meal sometimes gets boring you just cant eat it anymore
so when i dont see progress, when im doing effort it equals being un motivated. the fun should be within the process and not suffering and not seeing yourself progress,
so now im not gaining mass or anything, im feeling kinda not excited sometimes to lift weights cause i do the same shit and cant progress so it feels stupid to do the same thing with the same outcome so i have to change the strategy
that brings to me a lovely quote by Einstein :
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
that implies to subs too, like if youre not seeing results and youre still pushing for this title to progress with you, you kinda loose your trust with subs and youre like wtf am i doing? running a title when clearly im not making progress that is actually ideal and realistic ?