Main Disc. Thread - Khan ZP

#918

i’ve been using khan st1 about 2 weeks so far. i’ve noticed that i overall feel better. my baseline feeling is not a negative one i’d say. i’ve had some crazy lucid dreams and realised that my father really fucked up my sense of self and self worth/ esteem. he was always criticizing me no matter what i did. he was trying to compensate for himself because he didn’t feel enough. i’ve realised i don’t want to talk to him anymore, he has fucked my life, my mother’s and my brother one so hard it’s insane. he’s a bad person, very toxic and manipulative. he deserves to be alone.

i understand that can be harsh to say but if we were leaving in another country he’d be in jail for many years. he was beating my mother many times and really abused all of us psychologically making us feel afraid all the time so he feels powerful. he beat me and my brother many many times for nothing just to get his anger out. he was using as for his own benefit working in the fields and we had no freedom. he’s done many things. my brother tried to kill himself because of what he did to him. all those years of abuse.
by this full blown narcissist.

and i’ve realised that i was afraid for my life when i was a kid because he was beating me many times and i knew he was crazy. i knew he was capable of horrible things. that trauma still follows me. with khan st1 i’ve realised i’m not taking action in my life because i’m afraid i will be beaten by people if a conflict comes up. i’ve had lucid dreams that were me getting severely beaten. i’ve done ayahuasca many times. and the main feeling i’m processing is me dying. it’s a bit tiring but with continuous work i’ll get that out of my system. he should be paying me millions now for the damage he’s done to me and my life.

also there’s a lot of motivation to progress my life and achieve things. do hard things and push myself. i don’t even have to use my willpower, it’s just automatic. khan st1 is one of the best subs i’ve ever used

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#919

Done with stage 2 zp. Currently listening to Khan st3 zp right now. Let’s see how the ride goes. Stage 2 was so brutal :tired_face: :sob:

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#920

Hey bro, how much time did you listen to each stages? You started at stage 2?

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#921

How was stage 2 brutal?

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#922

hahaha @James I have the same interrogation as you :rofl:

For sure I’m running Sanguine with St2 maybe this is why I don’t feel it so brutal! Or maybe it’s because I ran it before!

By the way, do you plan on running Khan for the rejection issues?

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#923

Do you mean emotionally, physically, spiritually, something else?

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#924

I started with stage 1 qv2 for 31 days, stage 2 qv2 from jan 26 until feb 13 when I switched to khan st2 zp. Listened for 21 days and completed my washout

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#925

I received tons of rejection. Most days I was feeling depressed, questioning my life decisions and myself, most days I was feeling demotivated and lethargic. I lost interest in some of the things I used to do and some of my goals. It took a lot of resolve to keep pushing on. Sometimes I’ll feel so motivated, other days I’ll feel like “Are all this even necessary?”
Highs and lows. I was getting interest from ladies but then I couldn’t escalate even though I didn’t have problem interacting and engaging in interesting conversations.
I also was questioning myself alot especially why am I so nice to people and why don’t I stand my ground at times.
Now that I look at it, I think my subconscious was bringing up my flaws and showing me my mistakes but then no clue on how to change except that I knew that I was going through subtle changes.

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#926

One possible mindset tweak. Rejection isn’t something you receive. It’s something you feel internally. Each no just brings you closer to the next yes.

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#927

I stopped caring about rejections though. I had a feeling that wanted zp helped with that as well. But then the rejections discouraged me from approaching ladies unless in
convenient situations. Stage 2 wasn’t easy and I almost gave up countless times and move on to stage 3. I feel I still need some programming because I noticed sometimes Im too nice in situations I should be harsh… example while purchasing gas today a lady spilled fuel on me and i didn’t get mad at her,
i just accepted her apologies and left but then I’ll leave it to stage 4 to complete the process.

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#928

lol good stuff.

Had you been able to do the situation over where the lady spilled gas on you, how would you do things differently?

Was she at least apologetic? I know what you mean though. When people purposefully disrespect me, when I know if the tables were turned they would in no way respond calmly or let it go, sometimes I will let them have it but still most times I will just walk away because with most people I see them once and may never see them again anyway. Being able to forget my problems is huge. Being able to know that all I do is just adjust my focus and it’s not in my experience anymore.

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#929

I was feeling so bad yesterday during my washout. After listening to Khan st3 zp and Ascension chamber this morning 12:15am, I’m feeling way better, motivated, lightened mood and optimistic. I couldn’t even get up to iron my clothes or even clean my house or even wash the dishes, that’s how so bad I was feeling

#930

It was a mistake but then looking at the reaction of other guys around me. They got mad at the lady and even shouted at her to be more careful whereas me the victim didn’t even react. Another thing is maybe its cos of how I’ve been programmed to ignore pendulums or situations that’ll drain my energy coupled with the fact that I meditate and all. But I’ve also noticed that other times I’m meant to atleast instead of ignoring situations, act so as to not to be disrespect.
That’s how I’ve been questioning myself all through out stage 2 and questioning my behaviors and personality

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#931

well, I don’t even know if this is relevant to anything. but when we’re babies and really young we’ll look at other people to see how we should react. We’ve all seen the baby fall or make some kind of mistake and they’ll look to their parents as to whether or not they should start crying or not. But they’re also very resilient and will be back to laughing and having fun in no time.

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#932

Well right now I feel like a baby figuring out the best version of himself that makes him happy and content. Maybe that was the cause of the depressions and mood swings now that I think of it :thinking:

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#933

Was it all worth it? I’ll fine out eventually in stage 3. I already set my expectations in my journal.

#934

I went through a lot of what you went through too on stage 2 and trust me it’s absolutely necessary

A lot of things on kahn will make you question If you have the courage to keep going, it’s reprogramming and it shouldn’t be easy for anyone tbh. But I do sense you suffer a lot which means that you need more programming

For instance, I think you keeping it cool with the lady at the station was very manly

It’s generally your shift to a more rugged state and the fact it’s out of your comfort zone due to our current society, that can easily cause you to question why you’re listening to a program that progressively makes you stronger

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#935

Very true, I was thinking of doing diverse Khan stack when at St4 to support the growth such as 21 days of Khan+Rebirth, Khan + Limit Destroyer… Work different angle to help the mind absorb the most out of this massive program.

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#937

So I probably over did it but I ran Khan St 1 today and I feel weird. Part of me just doesn’t care as much anymore. Not in general but about stupid unimportant shit
Khan Total Breakdown ZP would be scary to run with Dragon Reborn ZP
What I mean by overdoing it is that yesterday I ran Ascension ZP and Emperor ZP
I even told my Wife earlier how at the moment I just couldn’t be f***** with anything other than what’s going on with us

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#938

First part of Khan, focusing your energy where it matters. This is pure alphaness, unimportant shit goes out the window.

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