Looking for some advice

Questions and Comments
#1

Guys, I have hit a point where I am now desperate as what I should do. As embarsing it is to say this I am 35 years old and never had a girlfriend. My approach was always let them come to me and just do little. Then when it gets to the point where even their friends tell me they like me I cower away. Feeling as if I am not worthy or they will find out I am boring guy with nothing going on for himself. in the past I have end up hurting women making them cry, or really dislike me. Nowadays at work I have some female friends that I hang out with, travel with, go out to lunch with etc…

I am finishing my degree but honestly I don’t really feel a drive for it, but I know I needed it if I want to get my desired job. I would like to do project management, I am excited about it and does not feel boring to do. Also I want to proof to myself that I can lead a team, influence people successfully.

Lately I I don’t engage my friends much I am not interested in hanging out. I feel less than them because they have their own house, kids a nice family. Or the above minus the kids…

Sometimes I just feel broken as fuck, why don’t I have these things? What is wrong with me? I even went to some mental health websites but didn’t find anything serious. Perhaps a neurotic, but nothing serious, I just feel down but depressed.

At the end of the day I just want to have a family of my own, good set of friends and a good job.

I have bought several subs from this website, my first one was sex and seduction. Which was great and it attracted woman in my life, one of them is now friendzoned. She liked me and I her but I placed her in the friendzone eventually.

I am also very much overweight and it makes me uncomfortable.

I really like meditation and have dived into it pretty deeply and I love what it gives me. I even naught this emotional releasing book TPP, it is about doing breathwork and releasing. It is great because it puts me in my body and I actually feel more alive

You know when I grew up I reached a point where I wanted to turn off my feelings because I taught it would show how weak i was and made me vulnerable to attacks. I also suppressed a lot. When my uncle died I did not feel a thing then when I saw him all of it started to come out but I just pushed it back down.

Part of me thinks that doing this emotional work will be very good for me. But I always self sabotage and end up nowhere. I am just weak and feel like I am getting nowhere.

What I desire:

  • family of my own
  • lose weight
  • get a good job and house
  • create good deep healthy relationships with good quality friends
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#2

Welcome to the show!
You are looking for advice which subliminals to pick, right?

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#3

Have you tried a stack with the regeneration, elixir, rebirth and limit destroyer, and godlike masculinity programs?

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#4

haha thanks for the welcome,

Any advise would be good to have, but particularly subliminal suggestions would be appreciated.

Right now I like to go big or… stay home. Something that transforms me and pushes me towards my goals/desires. A subliminal I can load and just set and forget and go about my day for 6 - 12 months or so.

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#5

Then maybe KHAN suits you. I havent tried it myself yet, I just judge from the text and what I have read about it in the journals. But beware, there is a reconciliation process that may go deep. It will probably take some time to clear up your hurt.

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#6

I suggest running regneration for at least 3 month’s. Before using any other subs.

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#7

Why not Khan since ST1 provides for a lot of reconciliation? You can run each stage for 2-3 months each.

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#8

Ah, you’re at that wonderful age when you start looking back at your life and end up comparing your accomplishments with what you thought you would have accomplished by now. And when you’re really unlucky you find yourself surrounded by people you barely know but who are younger than you and have already achieved so much more. I know, it sucks. All this time you figured there was time enough, and now dating sites and events will pair you up with 35-45 year old women instead of the 18-25 ones.

I used to have a really good friend, the kind that would do your groceries for you when you got sick. Really good guy, but not very successful at life. At 37, he lived with his mom, his room was filled with movie merchandise, he got friendzoned by all the women in his life and he ended up losing his virginity to the Thai masseuse he visited once a month for his happy ending. He worked as an assistant manager at McDonald’s and when he got a free ride to Canada on the condition he found a job and a place to live, he wasted it by making selfies with cheerleaders until his time was up.

I also knew a 20-something guy that bought old computer stuff and resold it. One day he asked me if I knew a house costing about 100k, since that was what he had lying around. My neighbor invented an app with two friends, you know how that goes…

Why do I bring them up? Well, if there’s one thing I’ve learned it is that there are always people better off than you, but there are also always people worse off. Accept where you are now and realize that all you have to do is move forward.

So, for the practical things, obviously get the training for project management. There are different styles depending on the branch. It’s not all traditional Gantt charts anymore.

Set some specific goals. For example, instead of losing weight, set a body fat percentage. Instead of a good job, figure out which job. Instead of a house, define your type of house and its price range. As for women, write down the things you look for in a partner. If you want children, aim for women around 30, that’s when their biological clock goes off and their priorities shift towards home and kids.

When you’ve done all that, throw out the idea of turning it all into massive projects with milestones and schedules. Instead, for each goal, write down the very next thing you can do to move towards that goal. No matter how silly, no matter how tiny. Actually, the smaller the action, the better. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Once you take that step, all you have to do is keep following your feet.

So without thinking about every step you need to take, just think about the very next step. And once you’ve done that step, think about the next one. You may not have the complete picture, but you know you’re moving in the right direction. And eventually you’ll get there.

This is actually quite handy when you are depressed, since overthinking causes you to quit, but something as simple as walking for 5 minutes every hour or doing homework or cleaning something, now that can be done even if you are feeling down.

There are other things that can help, but try this first. The fewer crutches you need, the better. I could give you some tips about exercise if you want, but for that I’d need to know how fit you are right now and what you consider “very much overweight”.

As for subs, I agree with blackadder. Go for some gentle subs first. Your journey will take a bit longer but you’ll have a solid foundation upon which to build your success. And your subconscious will get acquainted with the SubClub core script, which is part of almost all subs.

Since you like meditation, consider some of the superchargers. Legacy might be a good choice if you want to feel like king Leonidas of the Spartans, even if it won’t last all day.

Alternatively, if you are good at visualizing, a variation of Hypnotica’s Masculine Matrix might help. Envisioning a version of yourself that is and has what you want standing in front of you, then physically stepping into that version and experiencing how it feels in as much detail as possible.

And of course, after you get out of bed in the morning, take 5 minutes to picture one of your goals fulfilled. Once again, do your best to experience it in as much detail as possible. This primes your mind to recognize opportunities that will help you towards that goal. Which is why it’s best to do it in the morning.

Finally, start keeping a handwritten journal. If you feel like sharing things here, we’re glad to have you, but the handwritten journal is for you. A way to let the bad stuff go and concentrate on the good stuff.

Enough advice? :wink:

Does anybody get the feeling by now that I really wish I were a self-development coach?

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#9

I recommend running Emperor alone for a few months and then adding another subliminal if needed to address anything that Emperor hasn’t taken care of. I’m not a fan of stacking 4-5 subliminals together because you won’t get enough listening time with any of them and if that prevents you from seeing results as quickly as you’d like, that will only discourage you and make you feel worse.

Speaking from experience Emperor will make you value yourself more and will bring out the best in you. I already had a house and am not looking to start a family again, but got everything else that you want thanks to Emperor.

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#10

Excellent advice, @DarkPhilosopher. Will apply this for myself too. Bookmarked!

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#11

I’d go with Spartan. I can’t tell you how many guys I’ve known that were overweight but once they finally got that sorted, everything else fell into place for them.

I think we all have that one thing that is constantly and quietly always nagging at us. And we know it, but we also repress it or look away because deep down we also know it might be the hardest aspect for us personally to overcome. Speaking of, I need to take my own advice.

I know exactly what my issue that I need to face is.

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#12

Very well said, @HappyHero. Everybody has their own challenges. My biggest one is money.