Journal: SFI – by Akin

Journals - Major Programs
#168

. genesis - 30s .
. rest day .

My mind is in a very “doer” mode right now. I’m quickly getting things done—both important things I had been procrastinating for a while and small tasks as well.

On top of that, my confidence is really high, and I’m in a much stronger “I don’t care what people think” energy. I’m noticing this in several contexts where before I would “stay quiet” or “bend” myself so I wouldn’t be judged.

Anyway, I’m feeling Genesis as an organizing force at this moment. I’m understanding my priorities. I’m prioritizing actions that actually matter. I’m dedicating at least a few minutes every day to things I don’t want to do, but that help me move forward with the bigger goals that matter.

I feel like Genesis might be something to keep long-term (it’s one of the subs that gives me exactly what I need — the initiative to actually DO things).

I feel excited — and also imagining what Genesis:Ascension will be like.

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#169

. rest day .

  • Processing day, I couldn’t do much.
  • Angry feelings again.
  • When we don’t have much direction, Genesis can push any external movement — and not any external movement is necessarily good.
  • Feeling the strength in my legs strongly (The legs are related to our capacity to stand on our own and support ourselves).
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#171

I’m seriously thinking about making a change and replacing DR:LD with Regeneration.
Reasons: high anxiety levels and an overstimulated nervous system since I started Genesis. I feel like Regeneration might give me more grounding and ease in the processes with it and RoW

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#172

Its definitely worth a try. Regeneration is really good for dialing down the intensity when other subs might bump up against painful topics.

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#173

Yeaa, I’ll give it a try

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#174

. DR:regen - 30s .
. rest day .

Light feeling. This first loop eased some of the excess agitation in my mind and even seemed to help process older loops, including Wanted from 45 days ago and some from EoG. I’m curious to see how it unfolds over time.

I get a strong sense that handling EoG ST1 will be easier with Regeneration. I actually think processing anything will be smoother.
Even RoW — which is so intense for me I’ve only done three microloops since March.
Even Limit Destroyer — I suspect it’s tackling the main issues I’m currently healing.

(Just curiosities)

One thing is certain: I want to use EoG with Regeneration. And in a near future I’m gonna use Godlike Masculinity. I’m really excited to live this transformation.

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#175

. DR:regen - 30s .
. genesis - 30s .
. row - 10s .

Don’t know why I did it, but I did.

2nd reminder to not listen to 3 subs a day. There won’t be another one.
You know, I’m in that slow recon phase where it’s harder to think clearly.

Just breathe and let it settle. Don’t repeat it.
After all, it’s my nervous system and my life we’re talking about.

I really need a lot of clarity about which subs to use because I keep wanting to switch all the time. Money is the thing right now. I want Genesis to help me with this.
I committed to listening to at least 6 loops before deciding to switch to something else.

I’m really frustrated because I’ve had all kinds of results, but in finances… honestly, very little manifest progress. For years.
I’m really sad about that — and about realizing that even with subs, I don’t see myself moving forward.

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#176

What’s your main motivation for money?

#177

Start making money.
Ever since I left my job — a public service position in my country, very stable, guaranteed for life if I wanted — I haven’t been able to generate monthly income again. It’s been years.
What kept me going was the savings I had and a small inheritance I received when my mother passed away.

But that’s it. Since then, no income and money is running out.

#178

I see. Is there any way you can go back to that job? That’s a really tough position to be in.

#179

No. There’s no way.
These jobs here are only gotten by passing exams that happen every few years. To get one again, I’d have to study and take another exam when it opens.
Or open myself up to new options too (but I still have some scratched-up limiting beliefs there).
My struggle is that I don’t want to keep doing cycles and cycles focused only on money.

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#180

. rest day .

Processing… and:

  • Weird dreams about my first ex (really weird).

  • More moments of being the “leader” in interactions and guiding a group of friends to a chilled place.

  • Regen seems to calm Genesis’s impulsive fire, and even in social interactions it’s been interesting to notice how I’m acting more like “I don’t need to prove anything to anyone in a calm way.”

  • I made a joke at the bar with a group of friends and everyone laughed a lot. They kept laughing for a while. It had been a LONG time since that happened.

  • My last cycle helped me manifest a new therapist, and yesterday was our first session. I’m happy about it.

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#181

After some reflection, I realized that EoG St1 still needs to be a priority.

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#182

. rest day .

I don’t know if it’s Genesis triggering this or if it’s just a part of me, but I’ve been experiencing a very strong sense of leadership with it.
I also been feeling a more laid-back version of myself. I show up places and naturally captivate people — it’s becoming easier and more natural.

Anyway, the dream world has been very vivid and consistent since DR:Regen. I’ve been having very meaningful dreams, almost as if I’m actually living inside them, experiencing each one like a chapter of a story, very healing related.

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#183

Update :leaves: :leaves:

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#184

(post deleted by author)

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#185

I’m going to close this journal because it’s been a long time since I opened it, and I’ve gone through many different subs.

The new era is no longer just about embodying a spiritual force, but about being able to walk, conquer, and move with it. That is the intention of the next cycle.

In the next journal, I will report on experiences with GLM, Regen, and wealth-related titles.

#186

For now, my first experience with GLM (30s): it felt as if it was looking at me like this, dismantling some things in a brutal way.

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#187

NEW JORNAL s2

#188

@RVconsultant Can you please close this thread for me?