In the nightside eclipse: Emperor journal

Thought I’d start a journal here 'cause…things may be happening.

Background: I’ve used binaural stuff before and found it did made a difference. But having to “sit upright with eyes closed” for thirty minutes to an hour every single day was annoying. Briefly used a similar program as Emperor a while back but didn’t stick with it long enough to say if it worked or not. The other day, found SubClub randomly and wasted no time buying Emperor, especially when I saw “set it and forget it.”

Currently on day 3.

Observations:

Voice is deeper; a result of speaking in a lower vocal register, as opposed to the instinctive raising of one’s voice that people do when exhibiting rapport-seeking behavior. Can’t really point to anything specific except I feel a little more self-possessed. Centered, maybe. Less prone to apologetic behavior or emotional baiting. More “myself,” perhaps. Hard to say anything more concrete at this early stage except that something is definitely happening.

Current stack:

Emperor (ultrasonic) 3x
Sanguine 1x
Aura 1x

I got it running day and night. Don’t plan on changing it much. I don’t want to dilute Emperor.

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Oh yeah… I’ve read many times that these subs work best with a goal in mind, as opposed to just waiting for results to happen. So here are my goals. Broad strokes.

  1. Financial freedom. Enough money to travel anywhere I want, anytime I want, as long as I want. Passive income is great. A job is fine too as long as it’s portable and has a high hours to income ratio, i.e. programmer, consultant. > $2K USD per month.

  2. Girls. Lots of them. Not just the sex. The chase, too. The energy. The interaction. Life! > 100 notches.

  3. Fitness. Run like a kid. More muscle. Sixpack.

  4. Friends. Large crew to roll with AND a close circle. Close circle has to be cool guys: motivated, fit, wealthy, on their purpose. Awake. The opposite of civilian vanilla pussies. Brothers.

Let’s set a working deadline for 3.28.2020. One year from now.

tl;dr cash, bitches, sixpack, crew

I’m out.

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@ganzoben
O’nightspirit
I am one with thee
I am the eternal power
I am the Emperor

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aahah :metal::metal::metal:

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Yo.

Going on day 8.

During the first few days, I had experienced a short burst of confidence, maybe even arrogance, that seems to have subsided.

Numerous mundane events have happened that would normally provoke a much angrier or distressed reaction from me, but when I began to get worked up I reached a point where it just subtly dissipated. It’s as if an emotional threshold has been established and I can’t sink below it. If not necessarily happy, I’ve been feeling good. Just good.

These changes are not extreme or even particularly palpable. But I attribute them to Emperor on the collective observation that I am not reacting to situations the way I usually would.

Last night I experienced a brief jolt of negativity and that subtle self-critical feeling that I’m still the same piece of shit. That I do not respect myself for not living the life I want and that I do not forgive myself for the fucking mistakes I’ve made. But it’s not as bad as in the past.

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Freemasonry :slight_smile:

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Time was when I did consider that. But I soon got the impression that Freemasonry today is mostly comprised of elderly gentlemen having dinner and doing the occasional charity work. I may be wrong.

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@James Its best to reach for the stars say “I am a God amongst mortals”. The romans use to consider their emperos Gods.

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Depends on the lodge. Just visit and lodge and meet the Brothers for yourself. Shop around and see which crowd you resonate with more. The wealth of experience and diversity you will see in Freemasonry is refreshing. Also- There is exoteric and esoteric Freemasonry.

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Yes, I do remember hearing that lodges can vary significantly. Good point.

Difference being?

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There is a hidden meanings behind the rituals and symbolism. For something to survive so long with time and with so many great men participating in it…

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