I want to live a life of intention, meaning, presence, and happiness.
Before I explain what I’m looking for, I want to start with gratitude, because I don’t want this post to come across as if my life is bad.
Objectively, I’m very fortunate.
I live comfortably in a house that I genuinely love. I have a good car. I have a stable, above-average-paying job that is relatively stress-free and flexible. I’ve been happily married for around three years, I’m now also a father, and I’ve been training consistently for years and maintaining a very good physique.
So I’m genuinely grateful for where I am.
At the same time, I’ve always set extremely high standards for my life.
My mentality has basically been:
“Aim for the stars and maybe you’ll reach the moon.”
A lot of people around me consider me lucky, and I probably am. But behind the scenes I’ve also spent close to ten years obsessively trying to achieve financial freedom.
I’ve tried different businesses, investments, ideas, side projects, and especially trading.
I started trading forex around 2016. Since then I’ve bounced between different markets, brokers, strategies, timeframes, stocks, forex, crypto, leveraged products, swing trading, wins, losses, confidence, frustration, and everything in between.
And somewhere along the way I had to admit something to myself:
Hard work does not automatically equal high reward.
More importantly, I think my pursuit of money slowly became part of my identity.
Making money stopped being something I wanted to do and became something I felt I always had to think about.
That has affected me more than I realized.
Sometimes I genuinely ask myself:
What are my actual values?
What do I enjoy when I’m not trying to achieve something?
Who am I when I’m not trying to make money, improve myself, impress someone, or figure out the next move?
Even with my friends, so many of our conversations eventually become about money:
- Business ideas
- Investments
- Trading
- Properties
- Opportunities
- Ways to make more
- What’s next
And honestly, I’m tired of living mentally inside that loop.
The funny part is that one of my biggest motivations when I started all this in 2016 was escaping the corporate world.
I thought freedom meant not having a job.
But now, years later, I can look at my life more clearly.
My job is actually not the main problem.
It’s comfortable.
It’s flexible.
It pays me well.
It gave me stability.
It helped me build my home.
It gave me the financial foundation for my marriage and family.
The thing exhausting me has actually been the second invisible job I created for myself outside of work:
Constantly trying to figure out how to make more money.
- Checking charts
- Watching financial videos
- Watching motivation videos
- Watching self-development content
- Looking for businesses
- Looking for investments
- Looking for some new edge
- Trying another strategy
- Trying another market
- Trying another idea
There is always something else to optimize.
And if I’m honest, if I had simply taken my surplus income over the years and consistently invested it into good stocks instead of constantly trying to beat leveraged markets, I probably would have done perfectly fine.
I’ve also noticed that external validation has played a role in my life.
Before marriage, female attention was something I craved heavily.
At one point, after using subliminals and working on myself, I was getting a ridiculous amount of female attention and was dating several women at the same time.
I’m married now, and that need is nowhere near as strong as it used to be, but I can still recognize that part of my ego enjoys attention and validation.
And I think this connects to the bigger issue.
For a long time, so much of my life has revolved around becoming more:
- More money
- More attractive
- More successful
- More respected
- More impressive
- More free
- More everything
But now I’m starting to ask a different question:
When do I actually live?
I’m a husband.
I’m a father.
I have a young daughter.
I have a home I love.
I have a life happening right now.
And I don’t want to look back in ten or twenty years and realize that while everything I cared about was around me, mentally I was somewhere else — staring at charts, researching another business, watching another video, thinking about another opportunity, or waiting for financial freedom before allowing myself to fully enjoy my life.
That realization is probably the main reason I’m writing this.
I haven’t lost my ambition.
Not at all.
I still want to become financially independent.
I want rental properties.
I want investments.
I want successful projects.
I want to travel.
I want to build wealth.
I want to pay off my debts.
I want financial security.
I still want a big life.
What I no longer want is for the pursuit of those things to consume the life they are supposed to improve.
So I’ve decided to create a hard boundary around money.
My day job is roughly 8 AM to 4 PM.
From now on, I want that period to contain almost everything related to work, trading, business, investing, and making money.
If I seriously return to forex, I’m considering limiting it strictly to the first four hours of the London session, roughly 11 AM to 3 or 4 PM in my timezone.
My job is flexible enough that this is manageable.
And after 4 PM:
Done.
- No researching businesses
- No checking charts
- No trying to find the next coin
- No watching “how to get rich” videos
- No searching for another income stream
- No sitting in front of the PC hoping something magical will happen
I want my brain back.
For years, I thought financial freedom meant having enough money that I never needed to work again.
Now I’m starting to think freedom might also mean being able to stop thinking about money at 4 PM and actually enjoy the rest of the day.
So what am I looking for from subliminals?
I want to become deeply present.
I want to live authentically.
I want a stable sense of self.
I’ve noticed that sometimes my personality changes depending on who I’m around.
I don’t want to become a completely different person depending on whether I’m speaking to my wife, a friend, a manager, a stranger, or someone whose approval I want.
I want a consistent personality.
I want to know who I am.
I want to stop performing and start expressing myself.
I want to show emotions.
I want to be affectionate.
I want to be excited.
I want to say what I feel.
I want to stop filtering everything through:
“How will this person perceive me?”
I want to express myself without constantly fearing judgment.
I want to become more emotionally alive.
I want to enjoy my work.
I want to trade calmly and successfully without trading taking over my mind.
I want to make good financial decisions without obsessing over money.
I want to pay off my debts and bills.
I want to build investments and eventually own rental properties.
But I don’t want money to remain the central character of my entire life.
I also want a much deeper connection with my wife:
- More emotional intimacy
- More affection
- More presence
- More passion
- Better sex
- Deeper sex
- More openness between us
I don’t necessarily mind getting some attention from women either. I’m human and my ego still enjoys that.
But I don’t want external validation to control how I feel about myself.
I want my self-worth to come from inside.
I want a relaxed nervous system.
I want to stop feeling like I always need to be doing something productive.
I want to enjoy simple things again:
- Movies
- Series
- Music
- Driving
- Going outside
- Training
- Swimming
- Spending time with my family
- Eating good food
- Traveling
- Talking to people
- Sitting somewhere peacefully
- Doing absolutely nothing sometimes
I want weekends to actually feel like weekends again.
I want to wake up on a Friday or Saturday and feel excited about the day instead of immediately thinking:
“What opportunity am I missing?”
“What stock should I research?”
“What trade should I take?”
“What business could I start?”
“What should I be learning?”
“What should I be doing?”
I want to be able to sit with my wife and daughter and actually be there.
Not physically there while mentally thinking about money.
Basically, I want my life to have color again.
Not constant excitement.
Not some permanent dopamine high.
Just color.
Meaning.
Presence.
Connection.
Confidence.
Peace.
Enjoyment.
Emotion.
A stable identity.
A sense that I’m actually living my life instead of constantly preparing for some future version of it.
I understand there probably isn’t one subliminal that magically covers all of this.
I also understand that subliminals aren’t a substitute for changing my behavior.
I probably need some kind of mental detox after spending so many years consuming money, trading, motivation, and self-development content.
And I’m hoping my new rule — no money-making thinking after 4 PM — will be part of that.
So I’d really appreciate recommendations from people here.
If you were in my position, what subliminals would you prioritize?
I’m especially interested in anything related to:
- Authenticity / true self
- Emotional expression
- Self-worth without external validation
- Presence / living in the moment
- Inner peace
- Stable identity
- Confidence
- Enjoying life again
- Marriage and emotional intimacy
- Sexuality and deeper connection
- Healthy ambition without obsession
- Financial success without making money your entire identity
- Trading psychology / emotional stability
- Reducing compulsive overthinking
- Feeling content without becoming complacent
For reference, some of the titles I already own or have used on and off are:
- Emperor
- Emperor Daddy
- New Wanted
- Rich Trader
- Genesis Mogul
- Revelation of Wealth
- Divine Diamond
- Primal Nights
I’m completely open to being told that I should temporarily stay away from wealth/status-focused subliminals altogether.
Maybe what I need right now is not another title that makes me want more.
Maybe I need something that helps me actually experience what I already have.
At this stage in my life, I’m less interested in becoming more impressive.
I want to become more alive.