Furkan's Journal

Journals - Major Programs
#758

The yesterday’s conversation led me to think about LB again, but i wanna change my subs too, this could be recon i can run but what if i all have to do is commit this stack? And in my previous post i said i will run khan all 4 stages no matter what so i have to keep this promise. I will not drop GLM or KB too, (it would really great if i can run 4 subs)

But I’m thinking doing this, keep this stack until finish all stages of khan then replace GLM with LB
So in this case my first stack probably will last like 5 months. And I have to do some plan, to how will I handle some problems will occur in the future.

i have problems but still i have some hope
Hope is what keeps me standing.

#759

While i was praying there’s a thing came to my mind, and it little bothered me

The Introspective

This character believes the point of the contemplative path is to undo all our psychological knots and become a clean, free, liberated human. It journals, analyses itself, and becomes hyperaware of thoughts and emotions. It understands the mind’s workings to extraordinary degrees yet never really transcends it.

My partner had a sudden insight into this brand of spiritual ego when she missed a train to London by a few seconds. She was spontaneously able to see her mind as simply a bunch of mental phenomenon. Until that point, she had tried so hard to polish her sense of identity and psychology, without at any point seeing through or beyond the mind.

this is from same article that i posted superiroty complex thread.
i wouldnt post this but it came to my mind while im doing prayer. he says this some sort of ego, man i think you have spiritual ego. from this text as if he’s trying to despise of value of inrtospection and mind.
what if we are mind enclosed my physical what then now? man i actually thought writing this,before, now i lost my inspiration etc but. first how can you understand mind extraordinary and cannot transcends it and even before that what do you mean by transcends it. and what do you mean by mind? conscious mind? what if our minds image of god’s(creators’s or source or the whaterver the shit) and if our duty is understanding extraordinary power of the human mind and then now nature of god, reality. what then now? shumck. some times this tihng make me angry but little. okay i dont know too much im not into spirtualiy yet but this guy has website on it. or im in recon because posting this here no value, but fuvk it i cant delete all of this now

what im understanding from this, in life i should find my own truths i cannot trust people like this, i should experince gain knowledge from it but if i find high quality teachers this is differnt

i think its because most of people’s opinons interpreted through their filters like luther said. And this filter comes from a traumatised reality, but it is not only in spirituality but in other areas of life as well.
im in that reality too, but I’m willing to change.
what ican do best thing is trusting my sub mind and strengthening my relationship to my submind, i shouldnt see it as if it is apart from me

#760
#761

FzHGbGYWcAE3AMC

#762

F4D8di7XwAEzHSx

#763

yvonne de carlo was beatiful at this movie… anyway

#764

all the time i say; i want, i want it…

fuck it, fuck it. why? beacuse i dont have any clear image what im wanting.
when im doing prayer i say god give me health power etc and it feels really good. but for my goals i dont have clearness, i dont have clear image what i want to do it or what will i do, Then how is this thing going to manifest in my life?

#765

dont be stupid, dontbestupid
images,mind

time stop now

#766

beliefs? most of them for most of people they are created by others, and this beliefs keep people in some sort of prison and these people populate almost all of the world. then what kinda world do you expect?
what if all we are living fucking lie and contributing this lie. man even what point has this, writing here if dont embody principles, just talking. im alone
idont understand myself maybe i have too much time to think

why i feel helpless? what does cause this? what belief, what reason

#767

i was looking and searching some ancient sculptures etc man they can’t do this without help of a greater thing, this details… im sure that some of this artists tapped their power, tapped their subconscious mind and receive intitution from that.
Maybe this natural process of mastery. Their job, craft led to this, searching for more, greatness led to this

#768

When was the most recent 7 day washout for you?

2 Likes
#769

i don’t remember but i started this cycle 30th of march so probably it was that time, why did you ask

#770

What sort of pain is this? Physical?

1 Like
#771

What about taking a week washout?

2 Likes
#772

i don’t know my cycle will end 5 days later probably i will wait for this, right now i don’t want to take extra washouts if i feel really bad maybe i consider that time

#773

Both but i was referring to physical.

1 Like
#774

Hmm. You ran Paragon Complete before?

1 Like
#775

Yes
.char

1 Like
#776

You need to run it for longer, my friend. Do microloops of it.

That would be my advice.

1 Like
#777

You can run it with Khan.

1 Like