∆ ending Ascension ∆
∆ adding Attuned ∆
Redirecting things.
∆ Attuned ∆
∆ rest day ∆
Oh God. The recon from HS hit hard. Headache. It feels like something threatening is happening. My mind is literally trying to “push the script out.”
∆ 2nd rest day ∆
I’m having a shitty recon from this first loop of Attuned. Nothing to say—I can’t even name what’s happening. I just want it to pass.
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Are you running 30s of attuned?
Oh. I’m probably gonna be running this soon that’s good to know
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∆ PEACE + Attuned ∆
∆ rest day ∆
Peace really helps me deal with recon, so I’m keeping it. Let’s see how it goes.
I’m dealing with some internal processes around identity, but the country is also a mess because of the election that happened this Sunday. The atmosphere is really strange. Like, a funeral atmosphere. I don’t know.
Just going through it.
All of this reminds me that I need to strengthen myself and also stop being naive about certain things because there are a lot of assholes in positions of power. I need to be able to, at the very least, change something in my own life.
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That sounds like Heartsong Stage 1. Experienced the same thing this past weekend. I posted about it on the Heartsong thread.
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I’ll look for that post. I’m realizing ST1 it’s pretty essential for me right now. I’ll keep going.
∆ ending EoG ST1 ∆
∆ adding Genesis ∆
Had a dream and woke up with this strong desire to go back to Genesis. It’s one of my favorite subs.
My stack will be Genesis, Peace, and Attuned.
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∆ genesis + peace + attuned ∆
∆ rest day ∆
This combination really hit the spot for me. I had several insights and noticed some subtle shifts in my perceptions, and I really liked it!
I also bought Nero’s book (he’s the guy whose videos I’m always posting here), and I’m excited to start reading it when it arrives. He demystifies a lot of things about manifesting reality.
I’m going to keep testing this combination and see if Genesis alone provides a solid enough foundation for the financial side of things.
If it doesn’t, I think I’ll have to drop Peace. But seriously, this combination felt really good. Basically zero recon, too.
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∆ two loops of genesis + peace + attuned every other day ∆
∆ 3 rest days ∆
Usually, when I disappear, it’s either because really good things are happening or because I’m going through things so bizarre or strange that they’re too much to write about here.
Well, this time it was a bit of both. With more emphasis on the good things, though, and on some really good, beautiful inner shifts and insights I’ve been experiencing.
Anyway, there’s this girl in the picture (the one I mentioned who gave me one of the best kisses of my life), and things between us are kind of on “standby” right now, with less frequent conversations and more casual, spaced-out meetups. I saw her on Friday, and it was nice. One of my friends was congratulating me, saying she’s “really beautiful.” With a few caveats, though, because I went through some really wild processes seeing things about her while I was way too drunk and had to go home early. ‘-’
Besides that, I’m rehearsing for a performance where I’ll basically be doing the gala show for a local theater awards ceremony, AND I’M GETTING PAID FOR ITTT. Mooneyyy. 
Something really interesting happened and is still happening. I’ve gotten really close to someone I already knew, and I’m sure she’s a soulmate. We talk and laugh our asses off, and we understand each other on some seriously crazy levels. It’s been really lovely. But there’s one mind-boggling detail: she’s much younger than me. Like, a LOT younger. It doesn’t feel that way at all when we interact or when I think about how well we understand each other, but she is.
Well, I kissed her, and it was really good. But yeah, I’m just experiencing this, and as Saint would say, I really do love discovering myself through relationships. I’m going to see her tomorrow.
Anyway, about Genesis: it’s my favorite sub. The number of insights I’ve had and ThetaHealing sessions I’ve done on myself over the past three days to start shifting my beliefs around deservingness has been HUGE. I also feel like I have a stronger sense of direction now, and I’m gradually regaining the confidence to take action on what I actually want, while also questioning myself about what that really is.
I increased my last exposure to 1 minute, and then I needed a few more days to recover.
My best friend is moving to another city, and today was her farewell. I’m emotional because I’m going to miss her, but my heart is also SO happy that she’s taking this step. It’s inspiring.
I think that’s about it.
Today, I finally worked up the courage to open the email about the debt related to that thing I’m leaving behind so I can have more energy for other things. Tomorrow, I’m going to get some advice and formalize my proposal. It’s done. I feel like a lot of things are going to be released once I get this sorted out.
Either way, I’m going to need some help and good vibes to get through this in the best way possible. Wish me luck! s2
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∆ genesis + attuned ∆
Oh God. I met her today. She’s totally a soulmate. I’m afraid. She’s wild, fierce, intelligent, authentic, and says things as they are. Oh God.
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∆ rest day ∆
∆ genesis + attuned + peace ∆
∆ rest day ∆
First challenge in my relationship with her. 
Without going into too much detail, but things related to our age difference and other challenges in our connection became pretty clear.
It took me like two days to process all the emotions involved. Today, I was finally able to look at things from a more neutral, outside perspective. Still, even during the “crisis,” sometimes I was able to observe my defense mechanisms in action.
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∆ rest day ∆
I’m happy with these gradual changes that keep happening and becoming more fully integrated.
On Saturday, I ran into a close friend who hadn’t seen me since July 1st. She’s someone I’ve shared some really intimate and deep processes with, especially because we were doing our therapy training together. Well, she saw me in the middle of a crowd and didn’t recognize me.
She said she noticed someone with a familiar energy, but it took her a while to realize it was me. She was like, “Wow, you’ve changed so much! So many changes, seriously… You can really tell how much you’ve changed.” She even said my face looked like it had a different shape.
External confirmation, right?
I was really happy to hear that. I went back to check which subs I’d listened to the most during that period, and it was basically Peace, EoG, and WdB.
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