@SaintSovereign
Regarding this, you mentioned to me a while back that you found it more effective to ‘work with’ your demand avoidance, as opposed to trying to ‘overcome’ it (I forget your exact words) and suggested I might try this approach.
At the time, I felt a strong mental resistance against this, because in my case, the demand avoidance is severe, to the point where it’s cost me my job on several occasions and pretty much everything I’ve ever wanted to do or achieve in life, I haven’t, despite being smart and having a lot of potential.
The moment I want to do something, my brain just moves away from that thing and avoids it massively, to the point where it’s even doing it unconsciously.
Also, in my case, the demand avoidance seems to be about that any demand feels like a threat and my already dysregulated nervous system just shuts down that demand immediately and gets my brain to ignore/avoid it. I do suffer from a lot of fearfulness and feeling unsafe and anxious. So I think nervous system safety is a factor, as well as just habits and framing that have built up over many years.
But I continued to reflect on your comment, and it got me to thinking.
I made a custom recently with Emperor Executive and RICH (latest versions), as I really need to sort out my financial situation and life generally.
My thinking was that, if I just run it and run it and do my best to force myself to take even small actions, eventually, it might either overcome my demand avoidance by brute force or by a change in identity from “I’m demand avoidant” to “I’m an action-taker” or something like that lol.
On the other hand, I ran EE for 3 months in the past, and nothing at all changed.
And so far, with my new run of EE and RICH, again, I’m feeling nothing and feeling unable to take any action, and then just mentally feeling worse and worse.
So I’m also worried that by using this kind of ‘brute force’ approach, all I’m going to be doing is just making my nervous system even more stressed and paralysing my results even more?
Conversely, and here’s where it relates to this thread, you got me thinking about whether there could be a way to approach things differently.
RIght now, I feel somewhat depressed, lacking hope or belief that I can change things, negative instead of positive, paralysed with inaction and with a mindset of scarcity and lack.
When I saw the PRIMAL title recently, these two features stood out to me immediately (especially the second one):
“Embrace complete nonchalance and enjoyment in all activities, especially social ones. Cultivate an attitude of ease and pleasure in everything you do, making your life a series of enjoyable moments.”
“Foster relaxed optimism and a sense that all is well, creating a life characterized by positivity and hope. Approach every situation with a mindset that sees opportunities for happiness and success.”
(NB: I also need masculine development and to get out more and be more social, start doing activities, dating and living life after years mostly housebound with chronic fatigue, so PRIMAL has lots of other appeal too)
So I got to thinking, what if I just ran this instead? Stop trying to force action and just do things because I enjoy them, and believe that I can be successful?
And now, with the new Summertime, what if I combined PRIMAL with Summertime in the same custom, adding in even more feelgood vibes and that powerful nervous system calming?
(other options would be PRIMAL & RICH, or Summertime & RICH)
Thinking that this could be an approach that might actually work a lot better, alongside trying to re-frame demands as adventures and opportunities for growth?
Your thoughts and advice on this would be helpful, as this is a huge deal for me and something I am set upon dealing with this year.
