Day 46: My Desires
Day 16 of Khan ST2

I’ve been through many challenging periods over the past 2 years where I feel like that fire that use to burn inside me is gone. I still don’t feel it the same way I use to. Feeling unstoppable. On top of the world. I do feel some new wants, desires, wishes, and hopes kindling however.
I want:
- A new group of friends. Powerful friend group, where we can accomplish things together and truly enjoy our presence. I’ve been less extroverted since I was in college, and feel like people are too much of an energy drain to even entertain. That’s not how it should be. I cannot lead if I’m not even interested in people anymore. Loyal friends. We ride out and fight for what is right for each other. A pack.
Maybe Inner Circle subliminal?
2021 was the worst experience I’ve had with people in my life and after that, I just cut off all social ties and secluded myself in isolation for months on end. I still don’t feel like going out and being social again, and at the same time I need connection with other people that are like me. I miss friendship.





. I am currently sick. My bro got me sick and it sucks, but it will be alright and one thing being sick taught me is there is a lot of excess in my life that I really don’t give a fuck about. I just want to get better.
. These clients and coworkers at civ job have been mighty damn flirtatious and it isn’t even subtle… it’s in my face.





. Then a bunch of other stuff from folks trying to stroke my ego. It is interesting. I love it, absolutely… but keep my distance from people at same time. I enjoy having fans and followers.