Can you sit in quiet reflection?

Questions and Comments
#1

Countless times have I felt things are not working - maybe it’s this thing that needs to be tweaked or maybe it’s that i need to bring.

I will be honest. I don’t journal much. Not to the extent I’ve seen some who do here (and I love the journals and reading them). I do want to bring attention to a pattern I’ve noticed among those who grow rapidly and with strength.

They sit in quiet reflection. They reflect, they question, and they definitely don’t consider ignornace as bliss when it comes to their own self. They grow rapidly because they understand themselves.

Do you? Because I am reflecting today and I can read each of my journal entries and I remember the deep reflection I had when writing it.

I think Saint and Fire, when they highlight the importance of journally is not only about noticing progress, but it also is about reflection. Patterns, and beyond.

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#2

Quiet self-reflection and contemplation are amongst the best things you can do to accelerate results, from my experience. By this, I do not mean rumination, playing negative events over and over in your head. You have to separate the observer from the feeler. Seize control of the observer and calmly watch what the feeler is feeling, then question why you feel that way.

Journaling makes this process automatic and easier, since the observer, the actor (the part of you that takes action) and the feeler become harmonized and fused as one, since writing a journal inherently utilizes all these parts of your mind.

The key thing to note is that an offline journal is just as good as online. While, of course, we would love if you journaled online, an offline journal becomes sacred. By this, you should consider making a vow to yourself, that no one will EVER see the offline journal. If you must, write the entry and then delete it. The act of deleting it is symbolic – “I have expressed what was hidden within me, and now I will remove it.”

Also, by making it “sacred,” that inner censor and critic that prevents most people from writing freely is eliminated, since the journal won’t ever be critiqued by another person. You can also accelerate results with journaling by avoiding any kind of self-critique from what is written. Sit with what comes out, make no judgments. Simply correct whatever needs to be corrected. Quietly and without fanfare, or without seeking validation. Then the results will flow better because you are more aligned with your true self.

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#3

I do this regularly after deep identity shifts, burning the old journals, deleting old files, chats, images etc. very freeing.

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#4

I don’t like actual silence since my head gets filled up with doubts and fears instantly and it’s energy consuming and uncomfortable for me but I journal and reflect in my head all the time as I’m doing my everyday tasks. Like walking, showers, eating, brushing teeth, sometimes I even discuss something that I’m reconciling and feeling really bad about with someone I trust to see what they think.

But silence is a lot. I tried it, many times, elixir helped a little bit but unless I’m trying to meditate and have no thoughts at all, I’m not gonna have a good time. I prefer to listen to anything in the background and resolve my issues one at a time through small inner dialogue here and there instead of being bombarded with it or imagining unpleasant scenarios until I refocus my mind to something intentionally with a usually outside source again.

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#5

@Malkuth do you think this sort of experience is common or is it something that could use some resolving because it’s not as healthy? I’m kind of curious if you have similar experience?

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#6

Remaining in silence is so hard for so many. When you’re confronted with your own thoughts, it can be really frightening.

So many thoughts, feelings, and emotions are flushed up from deep within. You often feel like you’re drowning.

You might even panic, feel fear, and are sometimes paralyzed.

That’s why most people shy away from silence. Not because they don’t want it, but because the feeling of a noose around their neck is unbearable.

They smoke, drink, masturbate, eat, watch TV, listen to music, etc.
Just to “relax.” But let’s be honest: that’s not real relaxation at all.

I struggle with this too. I smoke, listen to a lot of music, and at times have consumed alcohol uncontrollably.
Yes, even masturbation gave me a sense of inner peace.

But that was only temporary inner peace. In reality, I’m running away from myself.
Recently, I’ve been practicing doing absolutely nothing for at least a few minutes every day. And I can tell You, my thoughts and feelings often give me a hard time.

I’m afraid. Afraid of what’s inside me. Of which memories might come up. My thoughts often circle around these things:

“Can I really manage all this?

Will I ever find my calling?

How will I get out of this debt trap?

Will my fiancé and I be able to live a good life beyond his family?

How will I manage to travel the world and support others through their challenges?”

etc.

I think it’s essential to get to know and love the silence in order to become truly free. That takes courage, and the courage to change.

But many hold on to things that harm them, because it gives the soul some sense of safety. But between us: that’s not safety, that’s self-manipulation at its finest.

Keeping a journal is definitely a good thing. Whether regularly or irregularly.
Consistency can of course show You more things You’ve already overcome. But even if You journal irregularly, it can make You aware of which hurdles You’ve already jumped over.

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#7

I have doubts whether there are any people out there at all that in silence, do not have their mind drawn into doubts, fears and negative scenarios 50% of the time at least. I may be wrong but I have a hard time believing otherwise. No matter how much you practice it. It’s good to reflect yes but doing silence for 3 hours every day being in it long term at some point is more of a mental masturbation over your fears than something useful. At some point, you really don’t need to do that THAT long. Since you already confronted all of the fears multiple times and resolved them (it doesn’t make them go always away so at some point it’s kind of resolved even if you do feel the fear and doubt from time to time). So sitting in silence in later stages (if someone wants to do it) would be more fruitful when guided mentally to places you mindfully want to explore which is already a lot of effort and will never become automatic.

Now that’s just my understanding of it maybe someone out there had different experiences

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#8

Silence reveals and nurtures.

It’s normal that your mind is out of control and full of negative stuff it you dont practice silence.

That’s the first step into silence, like a true friend, it starts by revealing all the crazy that lives in your head, once you can face the noise without believing it, you can start hearing silence talk and it’s nourishing with good ideas and good energy.

Through practice eventually silence becomes louder than the thoughts so there’s no need to spend lots of time time in meditation type practice and it becomes effortless.

If going into silence feels uncomfortable and like an effort, then more silence is definitely needed, not as a mental masturbation which stimulates more thoughts but as a mental relaxation that lets go of all judgements.

That kind of direct meditation with silence is not for everyone, a good workout can have the same effects, or good sex, or anything for that matters, it’s all about finding the right activities that balance out the nervous system

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#9

Search a hobby that shuts off your thinking brain and enjoy time you like

I go swimming for that, I can just stand in the water and be quiet or immersed in the moment.

Then afterwards some serious answers are possible

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#10

Beg to differ from what I read here.
From the people “who got result”, when you read their journal they don’t sit in silence. Most actually do some activity that allow them to shut their mind, but most don’t sit like monks.
And I would argue I am not sure they really understand themselves at all, yet they have a theory about themselves they are happy with when they write. A understanding that makes sense to them at the time they journal. Because when you read their journal later few month later they often change some of their views.

#11

There are plenty of people who experience the complete opposite when they close their eyes and meditate, states of profound peace, bliss, love, joy, serenity, calmness, happiness, silence instead of fear and sorrows.

Not sure where you got that information from.

To say that you doubt whether any people are out there at all experiencing this is a very bolt statement. I know for a fact it is not true. If such states exists who would not want it? This is the goal of all human beings but most have not figured it out yet. Nothing outside will ever satisfy, it is the experience of life itself that will.

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#12

I once spent 10 days on a silent retreat.
We head 10 minutes a day speaking with a professional about the things that came up.
It was an interesting experience.
The longer you stayed in silence ,the more was released from deep inside.

I also spent a few weeks in a monastery. Log periods of silence and prayer every day.
In the beginning the mind is loud.
But it’s like a pressure cooker releasing steam.
Over time the pressure decreases and so does the steam.
Suddenly all the surpressed thoughts are released and you start to experience inner silence.
And that’s beautiful.

I know @Jouissance regularly visited vipasanna retreats. Lots of silence there. And I’d say he’s rather successful. From my point of view.

Silence is the time when your inner pressure can be released. If you flee from silence and always keep distracting yourself, you seal all the pressure inside your head. And if you then experience silence you notice everything at once and it’s overwhelming.

So if you can’t stand the silence, perhaps try Sanguine for a cycle or two and then slowly ease into daily silences. Just a minute here and there and slowly increase, just as with microloops.

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#13

Guys, it’s not that deep. For context, I sit for 15 mins in silence everyday - not do anything. When you are out there going ham, you may not realise just what’s going on inside. So we generally fill our silences with more work. Doesn’t help imo.

I never said anything about not taking action. I have always been a big proponent of taking action. If you don’t take action, there won’t be any profound results anyway lol.

It’s just a simple question / reflection: can you sit in silence? Can you sit in your own company in silence?

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#14

Yes, I think this experience is very common.

And I do not believe we have to resolve it; just face it.

Some claim to have resolved it all, but they’re just pretending.

You have already begun facing it, or you would not have been able to write this post in the first place.

Once we start diving under the water, we will encounter many, many things. Some beautiful and some not.

There was a time (I think it was 2006 or 2007) where I was terrified for about a week (maybe 4 or 5 days?); terrified to even close my eyes.

That’s a pretty extreme version of the same thing we’re talking about here. Thank goodness it resolved. It really felt like being ‘haunted’.

It’s important to note that perhaps the central activity of the mind is Projection: the externalization of internal processes and conditions.

This is not a flaw or a bug, it’s a feature. But we humans are enthusiastic, and there’s nothing we love more than taking something good, and then doing too much of it, so that it becomes bad.

Projection builds a bridge between mind and world. It enables us to connect to the world and to live creatively in it. To feel a sense of Home and of connectedness.

Taken too far, however, Projection sacrifices self-awareness.

I ‘am afraid’ ‘of you’.
‘Life’ is difficult.
She ‘made me’ this way.

We take our internal processes, and ascribe to them external causes.

But the trees, the thorns, the flowers that we see around us, all have their roots INSIDE.

The external world is inside. (and vice versa).

And that’s what we face when we face silence.

Sometimes it’s a nasty business.

But, over time, we can come to understand projection, more and more. And that contributes a great deal to liberation.

There is no rush.

And I want to repeat: you’re already doing it. It’s more a question of pacing and depth. (How quickly and How far.)

You’re a warrior. Be kind to yourself.

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#15

Wow so profound
Thank you Mr Malkuth

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#16

:100:

5char!

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