Day 6: rest day
Moving forward my AM and Limitless ZP.
Today I am threading in unchartered territory. I guess that is what i like about ZP titles thus far. I feel like incremental progress are made everyday and also I don’t know what kind of surprises or curved balls are going to get thrown at me.
On the days that I listen, the sub is challenging me, deconstructing the resistances I may have and on the day I am resting it is integrating the new changes thus I feel better of course. Today was somewhat successful at work.
I got a bit more organised with things, created some files tracking every temp workers we have had for each client company we cover in a form of an excel spreadsheet. I am not super good with Excel but I instinctively know which tool will be useful for me.
For me it is all about thinking and implementing ways to be more efficient with my work even if it means working many non-paid overtime. I have a weak point with that as a matter of fact. The last job for which I did this I ended resigning from as after months and months of going the extra mile I had not being compensated or even recognised. This time it should be different as I have some commissions that I can get over my base salary which will give me the extra income I need to make a decent living. I want much more though, I don’t know through which vehicle I will make that happen but It will happen.
Anyway, that is about all I can say for the day. I am off to bed. I have also identified my sweet spot for waking up that is 5:30. After that all extra sleep is counterproductive as it makes me starts another cycle and I wake up right in the middle of it groggy as fuck.
Keep improving fellas!
Day 7: AM and Limitless.
Steadfast my brothers! Today was another “on” day and as I have read somewhere else on this forum, life and work seem to be throwing challenges at me so as for me to overcome them and say well that is done, I did overcome today but at the price at stay close to 4 hours non paid overtime.
I am worn out to the bone. I clocked in close to 60 hours paid 38 this week. It is supposed to be delay gratification for me to get up to speed on performance and results.
Yet It feels lonely and I feel like I have been there before stuck in a bind.
Nonetheless here we are on a friday night, I could go out have a drink with some friends but do I really want to? It has always been the same outcome for me…felt undeserving of everything I truly deeply wanted. I know tomorrow will be better.
Day 8: Rest Day
I am getting int the habit of writing this journal and I must admit that I quite enjoy building out the habit. The more I do it the more I become observant in my daily life hence more involved as well. I am not writing the most interesting journal thus far but things will become more intriguing in a few days I am sure.
So yesterday was my rest day, my eight day of running Ascended Mogul and Limitless.
First noticeable change, I am feeling less pressure to accept idle hanging out. What I mean by that. I had an airbnb traveller coming over yesterday at 7pm. So my whole day was pretty much spent, starting around 7:30 am, getting my place cleaned up, I spent some time with my mother, I went to a hardware store to by some stuff to fix up my place, I did some reading, washing, gardened a bit. During this whole time lets say from 12pm to 5:30pm friends of mine were insisting that I join them for lunch and drinks which I couldn’t do nor did I feel the pressure to rush to finish my tasks to join them either. I did eventually joined them but on my own terms, when I had finished everything I had set out to do.
When I was with them, I noticed something that I had noticed way back when I was running Ascension solo. That was my patience was running thin again. I am being more pushy and dominant, I push myself and people to make quicker decisions. I also noticed myself a bit more social, speaking to random people more easily. Anyhow, I feel more rested this Sunday morning and ready to go into action again. I told my sister that would go help her and her friend move houses so I turned down going out all night yesterday which I feel completely fine with. I am eager to seize the day.
Day 9: One loop of each on a sunday.
This is the first time that I get to listen to AM and Limitless Zp on a sunday. I have an interesting thought this morning. Even though I decided to focus on these two subs to increase my income and start building wealth, I feel like I am bound to get laid. I have an increase in sexual energy that is growing a little bit more everyday. Having quite porn about three months ago now I just jerk off in my bed at night fantasising about women I’d bang that I had interactions with during my waking hours. It is really strong arousal.
I helped my sister’s friend move to a new apartment yesterday. It was hard work but we did it. I had very strong hay fever but despite that I almost enjoyed helping out.
I do have a sore back ( lower back) that has been hurting for a while and so I need to get that check asap or at least do some good stretching. My hay fever can be annoying at times and It can stop me from wanted to be social altogether when I have a strong flare up. So waking up to a day today of rest from the subs. Let’s see what unfolds at work. Update to come.
Mogul/Ascended Mogul do seem to manifest opportunities for working hard and feeling a sense of engagement and accomplishment. Opportunities for getting money as well.
Glad you’re journaling again.
I can feel your determination radiating off the screen.
Good to see you back, bro. This is @raphael with a new username lol.
Regarding the above stated issue, you could try running your stack before going to sleep. That way your “programming and upgrade” will be done by the time you wake up. And then you could take action with the help of the already processed subliminals in your mind. Worth a shot I think. If it doesn’t work, you can go back to your current time.
And kudos to a great work ethic and putting in the work. Can already see that it will reward you soon. Cheers!
Thanks Lion raphael! I will definitely implement that right away. The programming and upgrade during sleep definitely makes sense. I wonder why I didn’t think of it earlier. Thank you for your input. Oh and thanks for the kudos! Support is always appreciated!
Thanks Malkuth! Your support is super appreciated! One day at a time.
Day 10: Rest day.
Heat wave going through my city. With my pollen allergy my sinus and head are close to cracking wide open.
Today was an " programming and upgrade" as @Lion called it so well. As a result I have gotten challenged. This time with coworkers. I get irritated as seeing how little responsibility they are willing to take. They have had no problem living at 6pm knowing that I would be staying until 8pm just to get everything sorted yet as soon as a problems comes up they are super quick to blame someone else. Funny how people are.
I worked again through my lunch time clocking over 10 hours again today. It would have been more but I had forgotten my house keys in my car ( on which accidentally are also the office key) so I had to live with everybody else at 6pm which I would have rathered finished more work. Either way, these last few days I have noticed that when I finish work any where between 7 to 8ish, as I walk back to my appartement about 20 minute walk, is right when my “programming” seems to fade and all of the sudden women start to gaze strongly at me. It is strange how this happens like they sense something.
I am struggling a bit sometimes when I think about how centered around work my whole life is at the moment, because lack of financial means…I try not to think about it to much as it tends to get me in my head and even sometimes get slightly depress. AM is definitely helping alleviating the negative feeling.
I am quite tired tonight so I stay up very long. Tomorrow I will listen to my stack at night, not right before going to bed as I would fall asleep before the 15 min mark ( i am a fast falling asleeper) but maybe about 30 minutes. I will report how this work. Tomorrow will count as an off day ( as a result).
So today is day 11:
I decided to follow @Lion 's advice and just ran my two loops before hitting the sack.
Today was an interesting one. I know that AM activated this morning as soon as I stepped out the house I got more aggressive and vocal.
At some point I got nearly run over by a bicycle and almost got into a fist fight with this dude who eventually backed down. This is rage that I had not felt since running ascension right when I started with sub club close to two years ago.
The agression toned down and transformed into bluntness which was just assertiveness. I think that is the end goal here, to be assertive and an action taker. I just need to channel this new found assertiveness into deals and money. One thing that go the best of me is that I have a lingering somewhat acute lower back pain which really tensed me up.
Tomorrow I am seeing my GP and hoping to get some physio done on me and a couple of massage so that I get all fixed up. Back pain gets the best of me sometimes.
Either way, It is all about cultivating energy now. Off to bed.
Sorry about your back pain.
What is your currently listening schedule?
Day 12: Yesterday was day 12 as I write in this journal in the morning.
Overall it felt better for me to have moved my listening routine of one loop of AM and Limitless in the evening rather than in the morning. The processing time do seem to then happen at night and a some throughout the morning.
Yesterday was a positive day at work and at the same time also quite uneventful. I was quite in the flow for most of the day and realised that I needed to work a bit more on being organised as running a temp agency is an insane amount of work.
I finished a bit earlier just so I could go to a doctor’s appointment for my lower back. It proved that I have gained 6 kg between january and now which is why I must lose some weight and strengthen my abdominal belt so that is going to be my new mission. Get back to training. I have got elastics at home a mat…I could at least do abs everyday.
Last night after my appointment I had an airbnb visitor to welcome. Right after my friend invited me to come join them at the bar for a drink so I did.
I regretted it instantly. About 10 minutes in and I was already bored! I can’t hang out for no reason anymore. It completely drives me insane. Way too passive for me.
Either was, today is technically an off day until tonight when I will be running my two loops.
Until then, everyone have a blessed day.
One thing that really helps keep my lower back mostly pain free nowadays, is Stuart Mcgill’s Big 3 exercises for core stability.
Nowadays I only do three reps and 1 set of the exercises as a rest free circuit, part of a warm-up for my main workout. I do that every day that I work out. It’s kept me out of the chiropractor’s office for a year and a half now. I just make sure to flex and hold as hard as I can for those 10 seconds on each rep.
Also I like the number one stretch for me is the Couch Stretch even though I just started it and am not flexible enough to have my torso vertical yet. 
Day 13:
I listened to each of my subs last night.
I did have some crazy dream. Was dad was still alive. I was leaving in my own mention. My family lived with me as well. I was dressed with all new expensing designer cloth down to my shoes. The house we had was in a village where there was a huge rave/ festival. Everyone was dropping acid, from youngest to oldest. Meanwhile I confessed my love to a hypothetical crush of mine who completely reciprocated it.
As I said it was really interested. I woke a bit later than usual as my alarm didn’t really go off as planned. I must rush off a bit. Happy friday everyone.
Day 14
So yesterday was an interesting one.
The overall flow of things was much smoother being friday. I feel like I was moving much more easily from one thing to the next. I am not very profificient yet at multitasking but I found myself much better with finishing things so overall focus has increased.
As a point of contact for my clientele, I am getting better as well. I am building rapport with clients without even trying much which is really enjoyable. I have decided to really develop my body and getting back into shape. It so happened that I am at my heaviest 88kg ever.
I have made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t be one of these 40 some guys with a beer belly so getting back to the mat to do some abs and some cardio. That’s about it really.
Day 15
I have listened to my stack list night so today was an ''on" day.
I must admit that I have a hunch that running the subs in the evening bodes well for me.
First I have very intricate and profound dreams about mostly conflicts that I havent resolved in my life or painful events, deeply unfulfilled desires.
Second the day after I seem to have close to no reconciliation. I still have hurdles to overcome but this is a normal process. My energy level are going up. I managed to start working out again despite the heat. It felt good. I am resolved to lose all of this extra weight that I need to lose to be leaner and not have that dreaded belly.
Friday night I hung out with a friend because I didn’t know what else to do. I shouldn’t have. I regretted it afterwards as we drank and did some really unproductive things. I then realised that my buddy didn’t come from the same socio-economical background as I so drinking, smoking weeds and sleeping late on Saturday is ok for them because they don’t have the pressure of working as an employee all week. I can’t. I really deeply realised that friday night…like a profound lesson…even though it really isn’t. It is just quite obvious. Either way, I just did the tally for this month between my salary and my airbnb revenues I am just about 2000e a month. I need to get at least 2200 from just my work income otherwise it just isn’t worth it for me to work all of these hours and I won’t be able to pay my rent and have somewhat of a decent life. I need to create money somehow. That is paramount.
Day 16
Yesterday I was tired man! I had stayed up lated the night before to do something completely unproductive and triggered by my lack of intimacy ( if you catch my drift). Hence, I was tired the whole day because I fucked up my sleep cycle and rest was the thing I needed about all else. As a result my energy level was lower than usual and I spent a lot of time trying to get it back.
Overall the day was alright. I am still improving the speed at which I do my job. I do enjoy interaction with candidates and clients alike but something is missing… maybe boredom is creeping in…lack of adventure, excitement and thrill…I just find myself wanted the days to go by again… I dislike this feeling.
Either way, I decided not run my stack last night and give me an extra day of rest since I was sleep deprived I thought It wouldn’t be wise to add another layer for my brain to process. I will resume tonight as day 17.
Day 17
Yesterday was an easier day to live through. I noticed that I had a little bit more mojo.
At work we went to visit a client and a younger women took us on a tour of the factory.
She was definitely attracted I could tell despite having put multiple layers of seriousness and professionalism on. Too bad this happens in a professional setting during a professional interaction when this can lead to nothing. Yet a bit of sexual tension is always nice and appreciated.
To be fair, my work weeks are quite uneventful and it is getting a bit repetitive and even boring for me to write and maybe even for you guys to read. I am just sticking with the process. Last evening, I run my loop of each ( AM and Limitless) which makes today my 18th day. I will report later.
18th day report:
Soon the flush. I am actually thinking of this more than the few days left on this current cycle. I am not exactly sure what that is. Maybe simply because from reading other journals I am under the impression that the flush out period yields lots of results.
I already know that I will be running at least a couple of more full 21 day cycles as I feel like the combo AM + LM Z have just scratched the tip of the iceberg for me. I am not satisfied so far with the progress I have made, even if have made some my situation has not moved enough to my taste. I have relapsed on coupe of times on things that are really not good for me ( masturbation, drugs) and that has affected my self worth and when self worth is down it makes me not want to open up to the outside world and stay in my shell like a crab. Either way, today I am receiving the 6th airbnb guest of the month ( i have a spare room I rent out). I think it shall soon be my last run at this as it takes a lot of time and effort to wash the sheets and clean the whole appartement between stays. It has served its purposed while I was switching jobs but now I am ready to make enough money to lead a decent life without having to have constant visitors in my home. I also have recently discovered the importance of proper rest and early nights. Basically if I go to bed at 10 and am I asleep by 11 at the latest I can get up at 5 feeling super refreshed. The trick then is not to be tempted to snooze as I am guaranteed to wake up groggy ! Here it goes, I have not much else to journal about. So long!