Azriel's-Unfolding ZP stack

Journals - Major Programs
#122

The physical posture changes in the new experimental are now joke- that’s what the back tension is, I can feel it completely altering how I stand and sit.

Yeah it’s the difference between ‘what is happening to me is scary and bad and of concern’ vs
‘what is happening to me is a natural great part of your life process’ etc

I saw the long term vision. We’ll be able to determine our own ratio of how much primer to thing to run.
It’s a solution for all. My personal preferences is the two ZP versions both available. One for microloops and other for longer runs

#123

Interesting @Azriel for me this new version has been incredibly smooth, no reconciliation, no signs of overexposure, nothing.

1 Like
#124

not sure.
I think on paper they would round each other out very well.

#125

Posted this on EmpX thread:

Just an update,
I continue to run (every other day) 2 x30 seconds microloops of Emperor Experimental stacked with 2-3 Minutes of HOM and this week 5 minutes of EOG stage 1.

I’m very clear what’s contributing what. My stack contributes to my general development but EmpX has highlighted a few things strongly.

I no long have back pain when I run EmpX. It became tension, and now feels like a strengthening of my core. This was also directly during/after running so the correlation is there.

EmpX continues to do a few things differently then Emperor

  1. Savy around when I go down the ‘get shit done’ rabbit hole and an ability to toggle between engagement and disengagement. HOM helps with strategic thinking but EmpX makes the engagement in and out easier. It’s takes discipline to not be a workaholic or work with intelligence rather than just dive in to grind mode, and vice versa it takes discipline to engage in grind mode vs. checking out to the big picture. So I have discipline for and a pull towards both dispositions

  2. My speaking and public speaking - just WAY more comfortable and confident. I’m also good with this but now I’m fxxing killing it.

  3. Generally less doubt- I just feel more like my own man and trust myself and commit fully

  4. I will say my sexual/romantic elements seem down on EmpX but I also care less.

  5. Way less anxiety generally.

I’ll likely to test Emp Black next week.

#126

Ahh the vicissitudes of life…

Shortly after posting this post the following has occurred

A series of conversations happened that have reset my entire involvement with this enterprise (my current work).

I was all in and glad to be and now I have to pivot back out.

Essentially what was promised me in regards to my ongoing pay increase and work options along the future roll out is being temp re-neged on and in question. All contracts and work I was supposed to be paid for at a much increased rate have been made good on except one invoice with no questions.

There is a way of being inside of scarcity vs. possibility, control vs. growth, and reduction/skepticism vs. empowerment and recognition that is coming up inside of my partner’s concern that is really such a pity. It means hardball games, less commitment and engagement etc. I’m distinguishing between where I can ‘feel’ myself triggered vs. intuitively recognizing what’s at play. I wish I was running PCC in my stack in moments like this but don’t want to pivot.

The bright side is is its put a fire into my expanding other pathways of revenue and with EOG stage 1 back in play I’ve never been so solid. I’m dealing with the deepest insecurity I’ve had around value/career/ finances on a performance and practical level now- it’s been %75 resolve internally and now playing out to become solid externally.

3 Likes
#127

Journaling more to move the alchemical progress
Likely not that interesting and somewhat dark.
I am really processing out quite a bit-and I think this has to do with EOG stage 1 healing back in play and the setbacks at work right when I was on the brink of what I really wanted.

Something has shifted again in my journey
Its reflected in a circumstance at work
I am reacting very strongly emotionally
I feel out of control, fucked over, concerned, and exposed
it is highlight all the ways that I am reliant on dependent for this as both a lifestyle and an opportunity.

More deeply it highlights where I am not aligned in creating who I want to be in life and the internal struggle both as a consequence and sourcing agent of this frustration.

The unease also gives way to more challenging existential/insecurities concerns

To be clear none of this has anything *really ** to do with work, it has to do with me feeling off track and at a loss to getting on track to being where I want to be in life and living that day day.

I am amazed at how I can go from such a powerful business orientation and possibility focus to dealing with what I am dealing with now and and/ off

I find myself with a familiar ‘trapped’ and frustrated feeling- indicative of a sense of worthlessness, disorientation, strong wanting to give up- and a depression- as a nominalization of the transient process of not effectively being with and utilizing the anxiety and anger that is coming up.

In particular I find myself up against blocks and ceilings I have not found a way past externally and what I am seeing is internally or well. Perhaps running EOG stage 1 again and in recon. So I’ll list these blocks- some are regressive states that consistently re-arise while others are more objective metrics I have not moved myself past

I find myself in a strong low - and know enough this is likely very temporary and I will verbalize it

  1. I have been unable to be consistently progress in a meaningful way that has any real value, traction, or foundation
  2. That I am stupid in how I’ve handled my life and my work and I’m paying a cost and sitting on potential and I am too unwilling/resistant to do anything about it and judging myself for it
  3. That I keep myself in delusion to feel good/better about things rather than deal with the reality intelligently, I justify this because lack of clarity and potential, and optimism can all realistically off set ’ reality or the predictable
  4. That I worry maybe I’ll be one of those people who never really works out finances and be on the low end of the earning spectrum. This trails off into strong fears and concerns around dreams unfulfilled, and old age and squalor
  5. That I am still stuck in a loop of reliance and dependency and have not done what is need to authentically have power, freedom
  6. That I need an external result to authentically have power and freedom in a situation.
  7. To feel real gravitas and capacity with consistently producing quantifiable external results that move the needle in my life, rather than some slow steady -always working towards something and gradually improving.
  8. That I am taking a harsh judgement on everything in my life. And find myself extremely angry at everything.

I was supposed to work this weekend on my own projects as well as paid work and I just had no ability to focus what so ever. I have comfortably stopped since my Halloween night but I find myself just really pulled to self medicate with that. Although I have not.

Something has come up since this last work incident that is a false belief like-‘hard work could lead to nothing so why even try’ and I am fighting that emotionally now every time I sit down. I imagine this belief must have been there before and re-emerged.

Feeling not great and that’s ok- it will pass soon

I will test Emperor Black starting Tuesday this week.

2 Likes
#128

7 habits of highly effective people would be a really cool sub

  1. Rapid Paradigm shifting for leveraging change/transformation
  2. Balancing production capacity with production in any endeavor
  3. Massive clear proactiveness
  4. Clarity around vision and seeing the end in mind in all endeavors
  5. A ‘heartstrong’ like synergy effect around relationships
  6. A balance between intense engagement and rejuvenation/ inspiration etc

May write more about this

#129

How was the EMPB run? I find it immensily calming for every area of my life.

#130

Incredibly interesting
Elements I absolutely love
elements I did not jive with ‘yet’
and had some intense recon

will post more this week

2 Likes
#131

Hey just curious about an earlier convo we had. When you said that khan helped you with networking and general power in work/social situations (not sex), what stage helps most with that?

#132

Sales, networking, and social power- stages 1 and 4-on Khan have not done the others on ZP

Stage 2 on Q had woman interested in me me and treating me like god’s secret gift to earth in ways that were quite incredible. Like I was just ‘that guy’.

1 Like
#133

I run EOG stage 1 (ZP V1) about 1 loop a week for the last several months.

I took a few washouts and a break last week. This week with what is happening in my life
I notice I am very concerned and anxious around money still. It still feels like a major impediment.

There is a freedom, and less anxiety around it for sure- as it used to be debilitating .

I believe I will do another cycle of EOG stage 1 on ZP V2 maybe 3 weeks and then move on to Stage 2.

I like to give subs the benefit of the doubt and I notice with a bit of time off things old stuff is coming up quickly- this means I feel safe to deal with/process that stuff and/or I’m not acknowledging the little growth and change which leads to bigger results/recognition and /or I’m not sufficiently producing the results or environmental shift to create escape velocity into an environmental reflection that will reinforce and perpetuate my results.

I’m in a bit of stagnant spot around money currently and want to get things flowing.

This means-adding new value, spending on the right things, and making more propositions.

1 Like
#134

Noting for the alchemical process.

I’m doing some major turn arounds with the right efforts.

I’ve noticed my performance is super high on days off subs.
As I become more self aware ZP is starting to effect me more strongly with recon and what I am grappling with.

Much less so with ZP V2. Emperor Black is a pure performance enhancer.

Lately- HOM ZP V1 and Emperor Experimental (ZP V2) cause some turbulence and decline in performance but they have me grapple and deal with things I would not have otherwise.
My character is raising while my performance and experience temporarily dips.
This is distinct in the past- where they would boost my state and performance and I would lose sight of the most effective immediate and long term use of my efforts.

Then on off days my baseline is higher and performance shoots up.
It may be time for a washout.

I may start running subs entirely in the late evening.

4 Likes
#136

Wow, it’s been a while since I posted

I was sick last Thursday and took off running subs until tonight.

My body and being needed a break.

Thursday night when I started to get sick I went on a night adventure to an urgent care center. I did some intuitive last minute shopping for soup and supplies. Talking the woman at the center into letting me leave and come back to hold my place rather than waiting there etc.

I felt spiritually aligned, alive, marveling at the pulse of the city, life and culture all around me. I did shopping got taken care of. The world was a magnificent unfoldment, people incredible. It was like I was present to the magnetism or gravity that orchestrated things. I got home, got cozy, and passed out.

Friday I couldn’t move- I slept on and off 20 hours and felt so uncomfortable I had to often mone lol.

Although the pain and presence of guilt of not being where I wanted to be was completely eradicated in my knowing I could only focus on one thing- getting better- which was really nice.

Saturday and Sunday were increasingly better, as I mostly rested and slowly started doing work.

Thursday I had spent 12 hours preparing for a deal we were live on, and it paid off as I did the work necessary to effectively get a really strong start to our fundraising. This really let me enjoy the time off more.

As I started to physically recover- it seemed my mind was still kaput. I had a low grade depression and existential malaise that was very strong. Today all day I worked, but felt slower than normal and have feeling cynical, resigned, and hopeless all week. Stuck in life and my work situation, which after being sick and returning to felt also very depressing.

It’s possible I went through very intense recon on my time off as that was my first week off in a few months. And I was processing a lot.

I ran 5 minutes EOG ZP V2 tonight- and I feel completely reborn. Reoriented- like myself again. While that’s awesome on one hand.

I am present to some concerns. Not real concerns but MUSINGS.

Was it not just being sick but time off subs that left with that mental regression.

Why are subs so beneficial to my mental well being- in addition to whatever their specific effects.

There almost like medicine to my low grade issues- ADD etc.

I’ll be the first to say acute effects diminish quickly but long term changes and transformation last but also only to the degree that the environment reflects what’s been shifted.

I just want to know I’m making real progress, internal growth, when it’s just me and me I’m happy with who I am through and through, in addition to external progress and results. And when the external results aren’t flowing I want to be able to lean back on my internal strength and conviction

and this week between no subs and being sick -I felt crushed, unable to get out resentment, depression.

Anyway musings aside.

I’m re-establish some goals and actions for my self

$10k monthly
Launch my coaching business with two $6k+ clients a month by Feb 1
Apply to 100 new jobs I’d 7+/10 actually interested in by Feb 1
Apply to 100 Free lance opportunities by Feb 1
Gym 3 times a week again starting Jan 1

I’m looking at moving to EOG stage 2 in Jan.
Still not sure when to move on from EOG Stage 1-this whole last week I felt extremely concerned about money to resigned about it- until I ran EOG stage 1 tonight.

If I’m not present to abiding peace and freedom around money internally a week after not running EOG -after having run it for 4 months? Well I’m not sure what to make of it but it seems perhaps not ready to move on.

Anyway I’m also in the inquiry of how to effectively use subs again for real. As I’ve clearly benefitted at times from acute results and produced direct effects- and since ZP have enjoyed a gradual raising ‘of the tides’ of my life so to speak. But something shifted last week. I’m getting serious about change and results in a new kind of way.

2 Likes
#137

so now you are running just eog?

#138

I was running EOG stage 1, Emperor, and HOM.

This week EOG stage 1, Emperor, and deciding between true sell and HOM

1 Like
#139

Going with True Sell this week and taking a break from HOM

Already noticed how True Sell brings cohesion to my self presentation-both to myself and others.

I will get my HOM/True Sell custom for myself for Christmas.

I want to test more Emperor Black, ROM as Emperor Fitness in ZP

2 Likes
#140

I am testing the waters on a True Sell - HOM - Stark stack.

2 Likes
#141

Please keep me informed :slight_smile:

#142

How do you feel they complement stark ?