AzrielLight EmperorQ

I had this happen recently, took several days off from work for vacation. Usually I keep my subs set up super simple. However have been testing out different modules since moment of extreme productivity from Stark Q and Commander.

Usually I don’t take shit from anyone, on the last day though felt really weak internally and someone seized the opportunity to attack.

It was so weird — days later I’m still shocked I didn’t stand up for myself. Definitely think it was because I’ve been jumping subs recently and got emotionally worn out.

I think this was a main factor in why this happened to me, although I haven’t been able to figure out any other reason.

For me, it was a playlist I’d had for about a month.

I appreciate you posting this! Thanks!

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@Azriel, you’ve used about as many subs as anyone on here. What do you think is the best sub for DEEP clearing and healing of childhood traumas?

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You described PCC perfectly. Had the same experience too

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I have customs with and without Deus.
The one’s without Deus feel just as strong
but the one with Deus I ‘like’ more and more over time. It also has omnidimensional and none of my other customs do.When I say like I mean I appreciate its effects, notice them, see how it’s benefiting me, it’s easier to listen too etc.
It seems more and more effective and relevant the longer I use it.
This may be omnidimensional or omnidimensional combined with Deus.

But Deus and Omnidimensional would stack and effect other customs I am using, although less strongly, especially since I have mosiac. Saint mentioned he doesn’t use results enhancers or minimal because he knows how to consciously guide the subs, so there is likely a benefit to keep it module specific without results enhancement as well.

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Hmm interesting. Will consider this advice for my coming custom

Definitely Dragon Reborn.

I can give more explanation if you want. But just as far as healing subs go I would say DR

Yes, PCC has to be one of the most fun subs to run in my experience.

Primal is also really fun, and so is PS: Iron Throne

PS itself is great, chill, flow and effective but the above two are a lot of fun.

But in terms of raw social power and freedom, being able to do anything, and be playing on a whole another level PCC :slight_smile:

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I’ve been very familiar and involved in Landmark Forum development programs
I think it’s a very unique, very powerful, ontology for quality of life experience and performance results.
And most any growth, leadership, self development methodology that is effective today, has it’s roots/influence from Werner’s work. Although he got his stuff from Daoism, to Heidegger, to Benjamin Franklin (O.G. Integrity as whole and complete)

I stopped reading when a combination of health and work priorities had me stop reading everything. That’s dealt with but I’m not back on track with my reading yet. I really like it and intend to finish it in the next few weeks.

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Thanks. I did Khan Stage 1 for a month. It was OK, but I don’t think it had deep cleaning. I think it had a different purpose.

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Khan stage 1 is just clearing the programming in the way of being The Khan.
Rebirth is very profound for not being effected by past incidents
Regeneration is great for slowly releasing -but I find it tremendously difficult and sends me into bad drug trip states.
Attachment destroyer module is fantastic for moving on with things
but DR is unlike anything else even on stage 1. It hits every angle and subtlety,
I find myself appreciating and loving my childhood self- in memory and at present, and having enormous compassion, power, spiritual persepctive, and strength for where I faced trauma and difficulty without dramatizing it at all, and this is allowing me to rapidly integrate it and move on.

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Thank you @Azriel for your thoughtful reply.

I want to build a very tightly focused custom around Chosen of Venus with profound deep cleaning. I want to include Dynasty, Transcendental Connection, Torchbearer, and perhaps FEBRUUS, Mercy Protocol, Pride Unbroken, maybe others I’m not thinking of.

I’m not sure how to integrate DR, either inside or outside of the custom. Inside would be more cost effective. But which stages to include??

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I would run DR alongside it
Chances are DR will cover most of everything mentioned either module specific or as a secondary effect. -Dyansty, and Transcendental connection excluded. Even torchbearer qualities will likely be covered by DR.

If you really looking for a profoundly deep cleanse running the stages in order could be of value

Or you could do custom with DR Stage 1-2 for several months then add Stage 3 or 4 to your next custom.

Not sure if I would mix two stages in the same custom. I PM’d @SaintSovereign and @Fire and I’m they sure will get back to me with their ideas.

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I should hit them up about my next customs as well :slight_smile:
Will you stack this with Moody or run solo?

Great question. I’ve accumulated a lot of customs and Ultimas. Once the new sub is constructed, I will need to figure out a listening plan. It’s not going to be easy figuring out what to leave in and what to cut out. Moody has Emperor and Limitless, which I really like. With the Ultimas, I have Beast, Executive, Beyond Limitless, The Commander, True Social, and Libertine.

A lot in the mix. So…I will need some solid advice from @SaintSovereign or @Fire on how to put this brew together.

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I will post a Drinks and Dragon pic in honor of DR and for the fun of it daily, for the time being

So I am completing a little over my second week on DR at 1 loop a day- and 2 the last few days.
I am going to run DR stage 1 through January as well given the size of my stack.

I’ll also start tracking my loops again. I want to do that everyday even if I post nothing else. So I can keep track. I aspire to @mecharc levles of consistency

Today Emperor QX 2 loops
DR 1 loop

Felt very little drive today, just kind of lazily had fun, did a few routines, took care of some business. Not really beating myself up for it, but do love a power day. My physical symptoms are rapidly diminishing since DR, and I have started taking new actions that were available that I was unwilling or didn’t see to do before that are also supporting in even further resolving my issue. Namely wearing the custom made nigh guard I never used before. Helps with TMJ issues, and dropping my medication in half. Which I had planned to do but was honestly too concerned about doing. DR is giving me a sense I don’t need it anymore.

I’ve also been less interested in sexual pursuits, I seem to get a lot of energy and motivation from threat, I like fighting a challenge, or overcoming something, I’ve devalued or judged this but I see nothing wrong with it, and will embrace it. It’s a form of realism to realize if I am not growing and moving forward I am on some level regressing.

I also notice I am feeling happy, and more fulfilled regardless of circumstance. Which currently shows up as a bit of loss of motivation :slight_smile:

I do notice the tone in my head very strongly by my 3-4th loop of the day, so may taper back more than that but am I enjoy a nice 4-5 loops daily. 2 Emperor 2 DR 1 Azriel or another test sub.

I’m not certain what my stack will be in 2021 anymore except for continue to run the DR stages. I am kind of going with the flow and letting things take care of themselves for now.
I was originally going to do Khan with DR, but am really craving PCC/HOM combo sub either way Emperor or even as there own to run alongside DR and Khan stages.

I love PCC and HOM, there so much fun to use, and the cause massive movement in my life quickly. I’ve never really tested Stark sufficiently so was also thinking of giving that a test whirl. I am writing on my own a lot to narrow down my main goals and priorities in practicality not theoretically.

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Haha!! being someone who has a reputation for sub hopping…to get a shout out for consistency rather feels good

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Hermit and The Moon- my Tarot birth cards-I just re-read this and realized how profound it is.

@Sub.Zero suggested creating a custom highlighting my birth card strengths and I’m going to give this some thought.

@James this is right up your alley, come check it out

The importance of night vs. The importance of day

The importance of pain / pleasure; beauty / ugliness vs.
The importance of wisdom/ignorance; persistence / giving up

The world as mysterious and uncertain vs.
The world as challenging and straightforward

The Moon and The Hermit share extreme qualities — low and high, vague and precise, yearning and ambitious, obscure and clear, far and near, many voices and one voice, fluid and solid.

For both, the journey’s the thing. For both, the heights are the objective. For both, illumination is the essence, while darkness is the matrix. One faces the darkness of the untraveled path ahead, while the other faces the darkness of the heights beyond reach. The light available to each leaves their darkness intact.

The Moon is the uncertainty at the heart of things, the unrealized and phantom possibility, the power of mutation and transformation. Shape-shifting unconsciousness and identity offer multiple realities that reflect inner rather than outer landscapes. The job of The Moon is to evolve, to move forward by inhabiting ever more subtle and elaborate forms, to experience challenge, growth and renewal with each new version of itself.

The Hermit is the finished, final clarity that shines at the center of things, the distillation of knowledge gained through effort, persistence, intelligence, and courage. Perfect faith and endless labor are rewarded by being lit from within. He becomes a steady, continuous, living light, a beacon to those who seek the outermost boundaries of personal growth. For those on the upward journey, the way is lit by those who have gone before.

Unintegrated and imperfectly realized, The Moon can be filled with nameless terrors and subject to depression. It may not trust what it sees or what it hears, and it is prone to believing the worst. It can be gulled into believing fantastic claims and stories, and may be drawn onto false paths with little or no reward at their end. It is subject to nightmares, and may come to fear sleep.

The Hermit can be ambitious, and lose sight of or never see how perfectly he can serve a higher power, or how pure he can become himself. He can be immersed in detail, careful of every step on the way to serving his own interests. He may be so practical and down-to-earth, that mysterious and unlikely paths are rejected out of hand. He can become so absorbed in making his own way that he has little time or patience for anyone else, and thus becomes isolated and emotionally barren.

Together, they travel from the depths to the heights, exploring the shadows and precipices that wait for every traveller on the path to knowledge. They promise faithfully that the great journey of personal evolution can be completed, and they will show you the way.

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Running my second loop of DR and present to a lot of shame and disappointment in my self.
It feels unearthed but objective, I can associate or disassociate with it. I see a value of associating with it in a realism way, or even momento mori way. Where I betray myself seems especially highlighted, as is the fear of reaching my potential. I am 32 and feel most of my 20’s got wasted with no direction, drugs, hospitalization, rehab, recovery, family drama. The best thing about my 20’s in an ironic in a way cause it also cost me my 20’s , was my endless pursuit of woman and nightlife. I remember every woman I was with like a star in the night sky, however it turned it, I loved those moments, they were so alive…even if I burned everything else to the ground in pursuit of it.

I’ve become almost the opposite now, reserved, homebody, I mean everyone is to an extend with global conditions, but still.

I’m noticing repeating patterns in my journaling of the spaces I am in and challenged by, there is probably some slight elevation, so things are spiraling rather than circling, and compound progress is great. But that’s also a sign to me I’m avoiding or hiding out from something that is out of view. My subjective experience of life is always improving overall since my sub journey began, and my external metrics have improved in spikes and gradually. But my progress is limited cause I am still taking baby steps.

I’m committed to make some life altering changes in the next 3 months. And that will require bolder, smarter action, not more grind

I mentioned hitting my $10,000K goal this month and have a few actions lined up to exceed that, but nothing is certain yet.

I also see how I am setting my standards to low, I need to start thinking day to day, month to month, about my financial pursuits, I’m thinking too short term-immediate commitments, and too long term.
I need to think every day, how to hit this goal. I think I am giving myself too much room to go through my ‘sub process’ while I ‘bake’ instead of getting on it. This is partially the difficulty with stacking, especially a sub like DR. I have to continually be conscious of this.

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