Avengers68' monk mindset (Emperor Black)

Journals - Major Programs
#1

Hello !

I decided to open my journal on Emperor Black, the most fantastic title I have ever used !

Started Sunday 7 minutes loop: I started small after reading the “freaking” experience of one of the members :rofl: told myself better go slow and avoid overexposing than finishing in a psychiatric hospital :joy:
Then day off monday, then 15 minutes loop tuesday and today thursday 15 minutes also.

Total exposure : 37 minutes in 5 days

This title is totally crazy in the good meaning !

  1. From the first exposure to now I have erased all the negative habits which are slowing down my productivity, focus/concentration. To give you an example, since the lockdown due to covid-19 I started with friends to have virtual appetizer around 7 pm everyday, our way of coping with the situation. The problem was that even after the lockdown we continued this habit, face to face or virtually. It became a real habit and I tried to stop it . But peer pressure was too strong. When I stopped I was feeling some kind of cravings, Oops ! It is time to stop before it is too late. Just on time, arrived Emperor Black ! The miracle is that from the first time I listened to it, the 7 minutes loop, I totally controlled this craving. When on Sunday I felt the beginning of the craving, I focused on it and told myself “euphoria” and magically the craving became an euphoric feeling ! Since then it disappeared totally and I don’t feel the need to drink for 5 days already, no fight with myself, I just don’t think of it anymore, just an abstract thing. Before when I stopped it was a fight with temptation, buddies etc. I feel the need to see less these buddies this week.

  2. When I stopped this drinking on Sunday, I understood the other part of Emperor Black, meeting and understanding your shadow. I will not talk about it, it is too personal, but I met this shadow of mine, mostly through dreams/nightmares within these 5 days. And it pushed me to read a lot of things on forums about people with problems of alcohol

  3. Eliminating negative habits, facing my shadow or a part of it I don’t know, and now I feel soooo confident, powerful. I suddenly received this week 3 proposals to be part of working groups with 2 of them in a position of leadership … I have not answered yet to these 2 leadership proposals but I know I can do it !

  4. Am I in a monk mindset ? In fact it looks like I can shift easily from one state to another: I can be totally focused on work for a certain period of time, time disappeared and then stop, and be fully involved in a conversation with my boss, wife etc. and then go back fully focused again in my work. When writing these lines, I am totally in the now. The mindfulness is totally crazy ! I have never experienced something like that. It is lasting the whole day and I can consciously increase it if necessary !

  5. Consciousness plays a very important role in this sub. There is a strong passage between conscious and subconscious. When I saw my “shadow” in my dreams/nightmares I became conscious and just became an observer of it. I did not judge it, just accept as it is. I did not wake up from the dreams with fear, sweat etc I just knew it was part of the process. I saw ugly things in these nightmares but I started to just observe, they disintegrated in thin air

  6. Fear seems to have been greatly reduced. My worst fear is public speaking … Argh ! it just happened I had to talk in public yesterday Tuesday with a crowd of 200 people… Like for the cravings, I started to feel the nervousness 2 hours before the talk.But I told myself if you can conquer alcohol, you can conquer public speaking ! I stated to re-enter a mindfulness state and all my tensions disappeared, I became focused on my talk. It was my best public speaking exercise so far, not perfect, but I am much better in control of my emotions. After few days of exposure, I am very happy !

  7. to @SaintSovereign and @Fire I am thinking that some modules for the customs could be : a module on destroying negative habits, one on mindfulness, one on reducing fear to reinforce the already existing modules

Oops I forgot the time when writing that I have to shift to something else :joy:

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#2

Good stuff, noticing some interesting patterns.

It’s a smart thing to continue journaling (be it online or offline) as it’s invaluable to pick up on the more subtle effects, especially once you start diving deep.

This would seem to be a good topic to do a deep-dive on.

Eye of the Storm, Everpresent, ARES. :wink:

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Main Disc. Thread - A Love Bomb For Humanity Experimental ZP
#3

I have ever present etc in my customs but they are not as potent as those of Emperor Black

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#4

Still a lot of dreams/nightmares today showing me my shadow. But I am not afraid, just observe them.
last night I was super focused and I felt a lot of energy especially in my hands and arms. I feel sometimes some tension in my neck and shoulders since I started Emperor Black. I don’t know if there is a causal link

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#5

Today one loop 15 miniutes.

One new effect is a powerful energy in my hands. In fact the energy is strong in my arms and around my arms but super powerful in and around my hands. I put my hands few centimeters above the back of my wife, she had a lower back pain. She felt the energy coming to the painful area and the pain disappeared totally after few minutes. It has been 6 hours and she does not feel it anymore. I don’t know how to cultivate that, it could be useful. When doing that, I was in a super hyper focused state, my conscious was nearly into my hands. Fascinating !

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#6

I feel this energy growing and growing now !

#7

My Emperor Black custom

Cores :

  1. Emperor Black

  2. Love Bomb for Humanity

  3. Sanguine

Modules:

  1. Ares

  2. Harmonic Singularity (relax mind/body)

  3. Ego Adsum (present moment)

  4. Iron Frame (calm in stressful situation)

  5. Lion IV (relaxed and powerful)

  6. Stress displacement

  7. Steadfast (rock in stressful situation)

  8. Carpe Diem (motivation, drive, ambition)

  9. invincible presence (respect, confidence)

  10. Total nonchalance (deep calm)

  11. Power unleashed (natural power)

  12. Dominion (confidence, power)

  13. Ever present (in the moment)

  14. Foundation (strong when storm)

  15. Mountain Breaker

  16. The Single Point

  17. Eye of the Storm

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#8

I was learning that the title of Richard Wagner’s opera Götterdämmerung is a German equivalent of Ragnarök meaning “twilight of the gods.”

I was listening this morning to music and it was dope, totally immersive music. It seems that EB is amplifying the senses, notably hearing

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#9

Last week the most important effects were about erasing negative habits slowing my productivity. Now these habits are totally erased, something of the past. Now it seems my subconscious shifted to productivity : since yesterday I am a monster of productivity, very difficult to stop and quite difficult to sleep. maybe I will have to add Paragon sleep.

#10

Any updates?

#11

@Kyuss I merge EB with ROM now. EB was dope at the beginning with a lot of productivity, monk mindset. But the second phase is “darker” somewhat and frankly quite frightening sometimes. For example at work I blankly talked to one of my colleagues and he was so hurt that he does not want to talk to me anymore. I was so surprised by my own behavior, I did not recognize myself !! WTF !!! Before listening to EB I would say the same but in a diplomatic way with humor and I would reach my goal. But that way, the way of EB could be catastrophic in a social setting :joy: I will have to learn how to control the monster. I agree totally with @bombayduck @Malkuth @Davisnwc that this sub is not an easy one !

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#12

I was trying to avoid saying it but yes, EB can reveal thoughts and behavior that you, yourself as the user find shocking and sometimes downright frightening.

Your first and second cycles also seem similar to mine as far as things getting darker during the 2nd one while the first gave a massive boost in productivity.

I don’t wanna paint the wrong pic of EB it’s definitely a great sub but it needs more time to be studied to see exactly what this type of phenomenon is and how it can be positively harnessed

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#13

I agree and in fact I told the guy that I regret having been so rude but his ego was affected :sweat_smile: But one thing, it gives a powerful confidence in group setting and the people are asking me to lead the group many times

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#14

EB is one of its kind but that is why it is an artisan title and not for every beginner.
You were good in reflecting the way you talked to that person and also talking to him again about that issue.

EB is a good title at the right time, I found out for myself it is not the right time or I need something else in my stack to balance it.

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