Adikk's Emperor Journey


#1

Hi everyone, I decided to start a journal about my Emperor experience. I’ll try to update my topic at least once every two days.

Until then, I listened to 56 hours of Emperor ( I mix v2, v3 and v4 all together ).

As I remember in my first day of listening to Emperor I was really confident and assertive.

Unfortunately later on my mood got worse, especially when I listened to Emperor v2 for few hours.

Last week was quite tough. I had a lot of stuff to do in my company ( Christmas craziness ) + I try to listen to Emperor for as long as I can.

BUT this program is strong as f*** and I can definitely feel that.

What I noticed, even today, one person from my family called me and said to me that I didn’t call her for some reason and I treat her like she’s fool.
What amazed me, I started to discuss with her in very intelligent, but assertive way, often I had to raise my voice. I hung up after 2 minutes of our conversation, because she had no arguments to get in discussion with me. Few hours later she called me and apologized for her behaviour.

I would never do that, especially this way, very often I take blame on myself and I’d rather go back work than discuss with people.

Next thing is I notice that I stand up for myself.
I always try to be positive, happy, especially with my customers. I have my own business and sometimes like I think for all of us, people are not respectful.

Yesterday at work one person raised voice on me. My reaction was same as story I wrote above. I was angry for what she did and I wanted to showed her where’s her place.

What I noticed for just 56 hours of listening to Emperor is I don’t tolerate stupidity of other people and it makes me really angry inside.
Before my listening to Emperor I’d rather keep my feelings inside but now… well… everything is going out from me even without thinking about that. Words are just coming out from my mouth.

I’m really interested how my journey will affect me, my business and relationships with other people that are important part of my life.

Wish me listening to Emperor 24/7, see you soon :slight_smile:


#2

So this is what happened last two days:

  • I woke up normally after alarm went off
  • Last days I was agressive, but now I realise that because of that I can destroy relationship with very important person in my life - my fiance. I spoke to her, show her respect, we ate and had fun during day.
  • I think my anger comes from healing traumas by listening to v2. I try take care of emotional disregulation by adding some normal spoken affirmations during day.

Any thoughts about that ?

  • I have big urge to listen to some audiobooks / to learn new stuff
  • Today I was driving back from the airport. When I was stuck in traffic, car in front of me hit my car ( we were standing on a hill and the driver did not apply the brake).
    Normally I’d be scared with confrontation.
    That day I just easily went off from my car, knocked to this person window, we spoke and solved all this situation calmly. I said to myself , that this case will not destroy my evening.

Important thing: hopefully driver in the car was calm.
If this person were aggressive, I certainly would not give up.
I felt like I was on autopilot.

That’s it for now. I still struggle a bit with thoughts in my mind. Sometimes I can just sit and watch one point on the wall wondering about some things.
I’m interested what next days will bring to me.

P.S. My English is not perfect, buy I hope you understand me well :slight_smile:


#3

It’s been about 70 hours of listening to Emperor.

Last days were very interesting. My fiancée’s parents, who came to see us were very happy, they acknowledged me for my support during their visit.

When we as family started to play Monopoly, my mind was somewhere else - what I noticed when I started to listen to Emperor - I want to be alone, not all the time, but I have big need to be alone.
I observed that I really wanted them to go out as fast as they possibly can. Maybe it’s not that good, but I had big urge to work ( even during Christmas free days I wanted to do something ).

That’s everything I noticed for last few days, best are yet to come :slight_smile: