I think my mind is ready & eager to take more activities than before i used HeO, but my body isn’t yet.
I kept brushing it off. I know that my body needs to adapt slowly, but i didn’t expect it to be this slow. Deep inside, I was too impatient.
It’s a long term journey, there’s nothing to rush.
I will dial it back. Listen to my body. And most importantly, be kind with it.
Update 1:
I’m now convinced that the effect of seeking, getting and being guided to get more clarity & certainty that I felt in the last cycle was because of DRLD. i read the description page too and it’s there.
it works, that’s a really smart way of breaking limits.
Update 2:
I just remembered that I had a dream about sword fighting. I do sword training so much that it’s even in my dream now. maybe it’s because of the sub too.
I know RM UW is the more modern title but if you’re not really into writing but like the Renaissance Man style of RMUW why not just run the actual Renaissance Man title?
I also was very attracted to either version of RM + HERO, they fit each other like a glvoe
I should’ve said that what i had in mind as a writer is someone who write things like books and articles. Something long and focused only on writing.
What i do is much more brief and not focused on the act of writing itself, but the idea of moving people, taking them on a journey, by what i do or make, whether it’s written or not, is similar.
I was thinking about using UA or RM like you said, but RM:UWX is closer to what i do.
this is the first time i ran HeO for 15m. i felt energized, and then I felt heavy after I played DRLD for 5m.
I want to take a nap. the drowsiness feels like the first time I ran LBFH.
Update 1:
I woke up and started learning & doing vipassana. I suddenly got curious about whether should i shift my focus to the sensation on my body or not, and more.
Update 2:
I feel an intense craving for food, something sweet like a cake.
This is really strange, I usually eat pretty clean. I don’t even have sugar or snacks in my house.
It feels like the craving for water when i was running WB.
well, If it’s the sub giving me guidance, then I’ll have my cake and eat it too.
Update 3
Yes, a really sweet food was what i needed. Finally after days of anxiety, unease, restlessness etc, they’re just gone. I feel normal again.
Maybe it was recon all along and not overworking.
I know i said that i will reduce my workload, but i’ll go back to the schedule i made after i started HeO to see if it’s really because of overworking or do i just need some sweet dirty food.
I don’t know whether the push to eat sweet things came from 15m of HeO or 15m of DRLD. Either way, it’s good.
Update 4:
This is a few hours after i wrote update 3.
Eating a sweet food was what i needed. I still feel calmer and better than before.
Is it because i do sword training on top of my workouts, work etc now?
Is it because of the subs?
I don’t know, but i will start eating sweet stuff from now on.
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Thankyou for the offer, but i got the ebook immediately after you mentioned it, lol.
I’ll think about getting the physical copy too, i usually only read ebooks, but yeah, for a meditation book, maybe it’s better if i read the real thing.
Productivity is back to normal, still not HeO level of normal, but I don’t have to exert too much willpower to do them.
I don’t feel as good today, it’s still within the normal range though so it’s not a problem.
Update 1:
This chain of manifestation of events is insane.
I thought the recon a week ago was bad. But that thought couldn’t be more wrong. It gives me the right environment that made me take more time to think about myself and led me to a sequence of events seemingly so unrelated to each others that resulted in me discovering one of my biggest flaw that i wasn’t aware of. One that has been limiting me all this time.
DRLD & the scripting in HeO that says unraveling through doing your craft definitely plays a part in it.
The manifestation is insane. It’s like everything lines up perfectly for me to increase my wealth and skills.
It feels like visualizing using the law of attraction, but without using visualization or even asking what i want. It’s like the universe just knows what i need and guides me to it. Very natural.
i don’t know why i always cry when I listen to at least half of LBFH. something clicks in my head and tears are rushing out.
Update 1:
I forgot to write this.
So many people say that I look & sound tired ever since I started HeO.
It’s strange, but i don’t mind being seen as tired, so it’s not a problem.
This will be the last time I run LBFH in this cycle, I need to follow the 12 day rule before swapping DRLD to RM:UWX In the next cycle. even after that, I’ll only run LBFH 3 times in a cycle max unless I make a custom with it.
So, I’ll write a review of the objectives and how much I’ve achieved with each one of them:
the change was drastic from day 1.
the more I use LBFH, the deeper I’m able to explore this objective.
“flooding your emotions with universal, pure love for yourself” works really well. i can feel it.
This one is interesting, negative self talk was almost gone when I used LBFH a lot. but the feeling is not. so I can still feel negative, but I don’t beat myself down using self talk.
I can’t tell, but from people’s reaction around me, I can say that this works.
oh my god this scripting is insane. i thought it was only gonna be small things. nope, the manifestation is so ridiculously strong that it feels like not only “others” who do that, but the universe itself is expressing its love to me.
this affects me in a lot of ways. sometimes it’s self acceptance, self forgiveness, self kindness and more. LBFH helps me heal stuff that I wasn’t even aware of before. granted, it’s really slow and subtle when it comes to healing past emotional traumas.
this effect is subtle. i can’t really feel it but I’m sure it’s doing something.
I can’t tell, but I’m sure it’s working. i think this enhances the good manifestation scripting.
i can feel it slowly releasing stress & tension in me. it was slow, i could feel it only after 4 cycles, but it works. give it time.
I can’t say the “be fully focused in the present” scripting works for me. but i didn’t do any meditation or take any action specifically towards this goal so it must be why.
i can’t say much about tranquility and sense of peace. but, for emotional prosperity, it’s like the universe is trying its best to bring a lot of it into my life. the change within myself and the manifestation is insane.
the humor scripting works, but i feel the effect more with crying than laughing with LBFH. it’s like I’m allowing myself to be weak & be embraced by my own love energy.
i still have no idea what wisdom i learned about love. maybe I’ve learned something, but I’m not aware of it.
that’s all. the manifestation and self change are insane.
the only drawback is reduced productivity, but that’s easily solved by not playing the sub for 15m.
i wish I tried microlooping LBFH earlier.
I think 9m is pushing it a bit too much. I felt a bit heavy after.
I won’t reduce it though since i only have 3 listening days left of DRLD in my schedule.
Update 1:
The feeling is different than when i focused on LBFH for 4 cycles. Back then it was about love and spreading it, realizing that there’s value in striving for others.
Now i feel like relations are good, but i want to focus on my craft & self improvement more. And other feelings that I can’t really describe.
It’s like how using Mogul feels a certain way, but it’s hard to describe.
Looking back, LBFH is really powerful, it doesn’t only change my mindset, but it manifested a lot of circumstances that helps me integrate better with it.
I’m considering ditching my plan to use DR altogether and committing to HeO + RM:UWX + LBFH.
As much as I want to experience the healing, I can’t afford to be inactive because of recon.
All I want now is to grow & master my skills with as little friction as possible from subs, HeO & RM:UWX are mandatory.
LBFH can be substituted by Chosen or True Sell, a big part of what I do revolves around giving better alternatives to people, which sometimes means asking them to change or even to part away with what they’ve put their time & effort into.
LBFH helps me soften & convince them. plus this is my favorite sub.
Chosen may help me lead them to a better decision.
True sell may help me convince them.
I’ve been thinking about making a custom like I wrote in yesterday’s journal, but HeO is already everything I want in a sub (minus the scripts for sparring). It’s really hard to justify making one.
I feel mentally tired after listening to it. now I’m certain my sweet spot for DRLD is around 6 minutes.
Update 1:
I got an idea
What if i use HeO solo? No LBFH, No AC, No UW
Why am i trying to stack as many subs as i can? Everything i want is already in HeO. Do i feel that it’s not enough? Am i misplacing my hidden feeling of inadequacy onto subs? Is stacking as many subs as possible just my habit? Or is it only my human nature to hoard as much as possible and it’s normal to do so?
So many questions popped out.
There’s only 1 way to find out, i will solo HeO next cycle.
Update 2:
I did an introspection.
I’m closer to the ideal version of me that i have been striving to be for years. It’s basically everything in HeO. I feel really fulfilled.
