Road to AEON - KB x2 / Alchemist X1

Journals - Custom Subliminals
#21

I am becoming better at receiving the " intuitive nudges " that is the action taking response to the NSE at work. Again, time is fragmented. I am doing things both large and small, like making a random call to an old friend to posting on someone’s journal saying something that feels like " it just needs to be out " but not in a cathartic way… but for " some reason " i have yet to understand, might never fully understand, due to it playing it’s part for " something "…

A more apt analogy would be a video game character and the player… From the player perspective, he is playing the game for the story and experiencing the world… The player, however, is doing things that would make little sense to the in game character they are controlling which ultimately contributes to the desired outcomes for both

I am the in game character, my subconscious is the player. My custom KH sub seems to have given the player the agency. I don’t claim super intelligence, being chosen or superior to anyone in any way shape or form… I am not living on the surface of my identity… I am curious of what lies deep beneath

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#22

The desired life. Its benifits, ease, perks and results… condenced in the now

A feeling… of having it all now… so full it runs over… an over abundance of it… it spills and leaks

It is so full looking anywhere else becomes near impossible

That feeling… knowing there is nothing better, it couldnt feel or get any better… and even if it could, it makes no damn difference…

Whats an ocean when flowing in an abundant sea? This is the new ground zero… the real one

Struggle feels foriegn. Hard work? An old relic of a mind addicted to struggle… seeing nobility in it any nothing else

Looking on the right… through the trains windows… i see life… i see nature… i see god… i see the sun bathing our beautiful world

Looking to my left… i see an equally beautiful brunette chugging a sugar free redbull

Oh how she keeps looking my way… constantly crossing her legs left to right, flipping her hair once every minute… shes been at it for the last 10 minutes

To my right i see the world… To my left a beautiful lady… i feel like saying hello to both… the world and it’s magic… served to me on a silver platter

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#23

This is pretty cool, it looks like your pdf link isn’t working anymore though. Would you mind sharing it again?

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#24

How did you get that analysis?

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#25

I dragged pdf for all subs & custom modules into GWEN 3.0 and i asked it questions about my progress regarding my custom.

It was able to give details contans info on entire title with all its 20 slots

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#26

Do not confuse how someone treats you for the current person you are with who they are!

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#27

For some reason, I’ve been getting recon in the exact same manner of how i used to on Total Breakdown which was almost half a year ago… Nothing like the recon post Anti Recon Tech which I’ve been using in some form since release.

It’s like all the progress, growth and control I’ve slowly and patiently build & cultivated for so long has collapsed before my very eyes. I can’t make sense of my emotions or what to do about them. Anything i do feels like the wrong move… Everything i do somehow makes things worse.

It is what it is i guess. The more i understand, the less i do. Progression is never linear for too long i suppose. Is that logical? relevant? a cope? makes no difference. I care little about control or logic anymore… I did hope for a sense of stability… Something i can hold on to. Yet everything crumbles as fast as i grab hold on it. Unable to hold onto anything, unable to fully relax while floating aimlessly.

Trapped in a matrix within a matrix within a matrix within a matrix within a matrix within a matrix… It stops making sense. Yet i am oddly at peace with that. Perhaps that is enough, even if fleeting

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#28

Perhaps the lesson hear is humility. While i truly don’t see myself as somehow still having an ego, real humility is acceptance of your limits, imperfection, and humanness, even after deep personal growth. I merely forgot to treat myself as a human. That will still have bad days, tempers and fuckups regardless if i was 1000x better or worse than i currently am.

There is no outgrowing, out smarting, out training or out-letting-go of this. Just like going number 2 in the bathroom. It has to happen. This ought to be where self love comes in. Sometimes, you fuck up regardless if you do everything else right. Don’t confuse your very nature that requires grace, self acceptance and forgiveness with perceived feedback of your journey…

  • Ego-free: Not identifying with superiority, pride, or control.
  • Humility: Embracing imperfection, mystery, and dependence on forces bigger than yourself—without collapsing into victimhood.

It’s so dumb, so silly, so cring yet it feels so right. Im proud of myself and my fuckups.

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#29

Recon got resolved. Feeling pretty chill and comfortable. Life can be unfair but thats not all there is to life

Im embracing simplicity and neatness again.

#30

I’ve known about this for years, but only recently have I been able to feel it.

For example as a metaphor, when someone acts rejecting towards me, it now feels more like a spongy football hitting me on the shoulder rather than a cannon ball hitting me in the stomach.

Have you read about the Taoist concept of wu-wei?

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#31

First time from your post but i’ve been doing something similar for a long time now. Since effort, logic and understanding stopped doing it for me long ago

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#32

In Taoism, Wu Wei (無爲) is a concept meaning “effortless action” or “non-doing,” emphasizing aligning one’s actions with the natural flow of the universe, or Tao, rather than forcing outcomes. It’s not about laziness but rather about acting without ego-driven desire, trusting intuition, and letting go of resistance to allow things to unfold naturally. Key aspects include patience, present moment awareness, and responding to situations rather than imposing one’s will… I want some.

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#33

Been A while.

2 Cycles on KB Stage 1 :ballot_box_with_check: and now for the Review

KB1’s most blatant & tangible results are related to sex & intimacy. KB1, along side Sex Mastery X at times, has helped me provide my reliable FWB with earth shattering & mind breaking orgasms that are truly allowing me to feel as if " if i had the exact same sexual chemistry with all others " then i am by far the best " lovemaker " alive. It’s that confidence of preforming, connecting and enjoying.

On the other hand i have gained equally important results that are felt day to day but mostly experienced when meditating or practicing my Neidan routine. I feel as if, energetically speaking, my blood is cleaner and circulates better. It’s like i am getting more oxygen with each breath but on an energetic level. I am also becoming better at sensing and understanding my own energy.

My KB progress is going very smoothly and i can even say that I’ve reached a point where i could comfortably say that i " get it " despite practicing the humble fundamentals which include relaxing, awareness of breath & the lower dantian.

Starting KB stage 2 in few days. This is where one " training wheel " gets taken of in my practicies.

Regarding the rest of the stack. I have began using Hero TLTB Earth recently. Since it’s said to have great chemistry with AEON then it should also be the same with KB, and i was more right than i could have imagined. For starters, the ability to both relax and guide, rather than control, the process of each exercise has sky rocketed to Mastery levels.

With Earth, I feel like by the time im done with 2 cycles on each stage of KB, I would theoretically have the results, progress and experience of someone using KB for years and years. Earth is just that damn good for relaxing, effortless control & presence.

With Earth, there is a solid argument to be had over actually needing a run of Alchemist and 2 for KB.

What about the customs? While i was running Heart of Gold ZP, Wanted came out and it’s been doing wonders for me. It’s synergizing very nicely with my current journey + goals. I have posted some of my new Wanted results on it’s product discussion page

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#34

It really sucks having nobody to actually talk to energetic practices. For those nuanced & detailed questions that can only be experienced when having an actual talk, beyond having a simple question answered

Not only that. So many other things that i can’t even begin to explain to those who might even be willing to listen. I wish i knew the secret to making and keeping friends with similar directions and mindsets in life

I’ve always been bad at this. No amount of social skills, giving to others while hoping the universe would give back helps in any way… and if it did, beats me how and when

Not sure why im posting this beyond venting. Might be a bit overloaded and need an early washout

This is the part where i go back to being stoic again. It just really fucking sucks knowing i am always receiving far less than im giving… and perhaps, it’s because of that i am generous… or doing it wrong if im not supposed to ever feel any frustrations since it would mean i am not perfect & selfless giver

I wish i had someone who fully has my back. Maybe i shoud stop being that for others as well. Whats the point either way. Everybody’s priority is always themselves, and im just the last numbskull to truly comprehend and apply this as well

2 Likes
#35
Some thoughts, discard if not useful

From what you say it seems you are rn learning to have your own back.

How can anyone give you what you actually seek if you can´t allow yourself to receive it just like that?

The one who gives feels exhausted, un-appreciated and abandoned, bc ultimately they overextended and abandoned themselves for a fantasy of what others may give in return.

The ones receiving often feel satisfied on one hand, but they also sense the unconscious expectation of the person giving, and as a result often feel manipulated/taken advantage of as well.
Its an unstable house of cards, and with how life and people are, things change, and porous foundations crumble, sometimes in a quite sudden manner.

You are essentially subconsciously suppressing/redirecting your energy towards someone else in the hope of them doing the same for you.

That´s what neediness is, on both ends, it´s always unstable.

People can´t give to others what they don´t embody themselves, it goes both ways.

If you give from a place of lack, hoping others will reciprocate, you are setting yourself up for repeated, major dissapointments.

Mastering this is also a foundational aspect of “energetic practice”, as emotional neediness is basically the expectation of others filling up the emotional/energetic reservoir that you carry within yourself already.

But you already have an infinite well of your own essence at your disposal, even if you aren´t as connected to it yet as you will be soon. It´s impossible to expect anyone else to fill your cup in such a manner, how could they? You are already infinite, you already have everything what it takes inside of you.

The same goes the other way around, who say you have to be “generous” ? How do you even measure your generosity, how do you define it? Where do these measurements and expectations, these identifications come from?

Seems your stack is working very good for you.
And when you get to that point, you will be able to chose if and what to give, and others will truly appreciate you for it, because you are now giving with your full heart and soul.

I hope this makes sense and helped a little.

Best wishes to you Saiyan.

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#36

I fully agree and i do operate from that space 99,999% of the time. To say i feel this rarely would be an understatement. It’s like i just woke up and after dealing with overload for a while now… and simply wondered how it would feel to have someone have my back, help me with my blind spots and truly push me forward the way i do with many others without expecting much.

Then again. Maybe i am not meant to have everything and should be grateful for being intelligent & diligent enough to make it this far on my own

#37

KB ST2: Whenever i have a moment to relax, close my eyes and breathe deeply. I sense strong currents pulsating around my legs, arms and a bit randomly in the body. It feels like i had veins i never felt nor sense, expand and stretch for the first time and i am feeling it.

The Neidan practice is going well. I am becoming better at sensing energy within my body. Yet i still struggle with BS which New Wanted is working on clearing.

As it would seem, my life long struggles are embedded in my very nervous system. It explains why no will power, wisdom, knowledge, effort, practice has put a dent on it. Each step felt like leveling up against an enemy, beating it to a pulp… feeling free for moments before it respawns scaled to my new level… Now i doubt it’s even within the reach of any subliminal to heal… or more accurately put. It’s my turn to take proper action with this, regardless of sub/stack, i simply need to continue giving myself grace… identifying less and less while focusing more and more on the happy, positive and desired.

I am even losing much interest in AEON compared to when i started, since i no longer view it as some missing key nor advantage to my freedom. I simply see it title that has the potential to take me to an advanced stage of being, alongside many surprises, but if i were today be called crude gold, and AEON makes me refine… i am still the same gold… i was not some cheap steel that turned to TITANIUM… nah, the magic is here and now. always will be