Changing System, Changing Life [Wanted, EoG, Spartan]

Journals - Major Programs
#1

Here I Go, Another Journal Another Try, But This Time An Honest Try

This time I will not only listen to subs but will take action too. I will stick to subs for a long time with maximum actions.

I am changing the entire system and the way of living my life, discarding all the bad frictions which holding me from being an awesome personality, Subs showing me the real me & after meeting the real me, I come to know how much work I have to do in every area of my life, just by rumbling I am the best, I will not become the best.

It’s because of sub-EoG that I came to know about my bad habits & exactly what holding me back from living the good life, Duh forget about the awesome life I don’t even live an average life because If I keep repeating what I was repeating in the past then my future will be not be good

So this journal will go deep inside every sub I am going to listen to, this may sound boring but I promise as I progress ahead I am sure a new adventure will be open every day.
I am more concerned about my inner game than the outer game right now, this journey will be very deep & somewhat personal too.

So how this journal will differ from my other ones?
It will be circulating more around the Atomic Habit of James Clear, First time in my life, I am sticking to something because I was being random my whole life.

I come to know how can I change my life by keep repeating important stuff It can be automated in life So that I can no longer have to wonder how can I overcome daily challenges in my life, though I am sure I can do it, the problem is I am not doing it.

In this journal I will go inside every sub & will take massive actions, So That I can take the whole benefit of Subliminal

Sub Day 1
After coming out of washout day, Today I listened to Wanted experimental & EoG ST1.

I am feeling very calm, Collective & energetic on Wanted. My family went to dine outside but I didn’t go for the reason of “respect”. Though it was my favorite restaurant & food. But I put respect over food today. I just wanted to set an example, I won’t accept further disrespect towards myself & take myself seriously, They all love me & called me 10’s times but I calmly said I am on a diet so I can’t come, unlike other times, where I would put tantrum, explain my self & even cry. Yes, I cried a lot in the last decade & so, I was the weak bastard who can’t control his emotions until now.

Apart from that, I stopped myself from seeking approval from girls. There’s thinking that keeps coming into my mind that I shouldn’t approach or please anyone. I should build myself like that people should keep coming to me or desire me. I noticed a few people who has some good holding in the gym talked to me & even saw girls glancing at me.

I even saw Videos about making my face more symmetrical etc. & most important I didn’t watch any time-wasting videos on youtube or on any other platform.

I keep trying to save time & want to take meaningful actions all day of my life. I hope in this cycle I will build good habits.

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Main Disc. Thread - Wanted ZP v2
#2

I wanted to comment on this part. I used to wonder whether or not my journal was boring for others to read, and then I realized; it’s not my social media account. It’s my journal.

Sure, others will read your journal. But your journal is for your journey not our amusement :slight_smile:

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#3

Super cool stack, extremely balanced, hits all areas of life! Excited to see this in action.

1 Like
#4

good luck mate. you are on right track.

1 Like
#5

Day 16 Sub Day

So it’s been over 16 days since I started this new journey of mine & believe me lots of things happen in those 16 days, I wish I could journal all those moments because all are very negative, very bad & worst days of my life.

Out of All of this only positive thing was I got to know one of the most important blockages of my life & which was “fear of failure”
For the last 15 years, the main reason I procrastinated that much was only that extreme fear of failure.

by listening or reading it seems very very very easy peasy thing but realizing this part was extremely hard.

after so many months of sticking to sub with disciple I am now changing my stack in the middle of the cycle, why I will tell you guys because I felt immense pain but now I am ok, Changing stack just to set my priority straight to the point.

I just dont want any sympathy today but I want to be extremely successful now, I want to break & destroy that block that kept me stagnated for all those years

My stack is an extreme focus on wealth & a little over alphas & seduction or sex

EoG ST1 (wealth)
Emperor (wealth+alpha+status+sex/seduction)
Limit Destroyer (removing limiting beliefs & internal blockages)

in the past, I have been told don’t mix multi-stage sub so I am not going with Quantum Limitless, maybe after EoG all stages

So what I have got after changing or moving to Limit Destroyer
benefits

  1. will no longer treat work as something special where I want a timer, or reward after completing it.
  2. removing the dependency of sitting & working mentality, I can still learn from mobile & take notes & apply as an action
  3. getting familiar with all the courses, real actions
    for example

freelance work
making portfolio site to get accepted on a big platform
watching tutorial videos repeatedly if not present on the PC
totally removing seduction from life till I go to other countries & start earning lots of money
laser-sharp focus with enjoying a happy face while watching learning applying taking meaningful actions every minute without depending on every other blockage.
will not treat work as a celebrity but like an entertainment video which I even watch on the toilet seat :slight_smile:

#6

Day 19 Rest Day

I have always run, run, run, run away from life, run away from important things, run away from classes, run away from college, run away from exams, run away from learning, run away from money, run away from everything

Every time in the last 15 years, I am unable to handle pressure, unable to handle focus, unable to handle everything well, I was just stuck in a loop, I am sticking in the loop, I tried several ways to break the loop the block, but the block is rooted deep inside me, it’s so inside that it becomes my identity.

Now I am so afraid that I fear getting vanished from the face of the earth without achieving anything. Is this a life? Did I want? Did anyone want it? I was after cheap dopamine & cheap pleasure all those years, These cheap dopamine shots are integrated into me so deep inside, now it seems so hard to remove it from my mind.

Now I am even afraid that I can’t even feed my family, it looks like all hopes are lost, all things are getting finished & I will be lost forever if I keep repeating what I have been repeating for all those years, No more Mr. Me :frowning:

But there’s hope, there’s a little ray I can see in these cloudy atmospheres, a ray of hope that I will be as successful as others or maybe more than them, there’s a still chance, still a little hope inside me a voice which keeps telling me, all is not lost, all is not finished, I can still rise & smash all my goals, I will achieve the height of greatness if I slightly make the adjustment into my mindset.

What’s that change? What’s that adjustment? What’s that thing?
Do I have to watch any motivational videos? or a movie?
Do I have to read about successful people? or their movie?
Do I have to purchase a self-help book? or their workshop movie?
Do I have to seduce girls to increase my self-esteem? or watch a heroic movie?
Do I have to fake on social media so that I can brag & scam people? or watch a money heist movie?
Do I have to purchase another subliminal that I will manifest money ? or watch a manifestation movie?

I don’t think, I need any of these…
I already have what I need
No matter what happened in the future,
I exactly know what I need to grow

I just need to face them & stop running away
I just need to face them my goals & their tasks
I just need to face them all the time without being afraid
I just need to face them daily no matter what
I just need to face them as if my life depends on them & it is
I just need to face the things which I am most afraid of
I just need to face them & make them part of my life

But why I am afraid of them in the 1st place?
Yep, I remember exactly why & how this block came into my life & stays that long.

I was a teenager when in a practical exam I didn’t study, the teacher scolded me in front of girls.
& beat with stick on my hand, all girls laugh, few students made fun, after that, I went to the theatre to watch a movie & the climax made me crazy, the protagonist turn of the event makes me think that I should be that character & shock everyone that I am best.

Instead of studying, I practiced his dialogue, how he walks, and talks about everything but just not the real thing which is called study learning. But I never become that character, nope never.
But I start delaying things until I become like that character then I will do this & that.

Neither did I become that character nor I did do really important things in life. I started to fail in everything after that. Slowly after years, that character fades away but the only thing that remains is delaying things.

Now here I am changing stack yet once again in hope of letting’s remove that block once & for all by practicing & staying consistent on goals or on things that matter most now, stop delaying & keep myself in motion instead of real actions.

Sometimes I feel like I am in a cell & just living life for the sake of living with cheap dopamine & pleasure of life, like porn, girls, cheap validations, movies, tv shows, sports, social media, internet & all these loops without real important things which matter most to my career.

It’s a cell of a never-ending loop. Even if somehow I break that cycle for a day or two, It again comes back. I don’t do drugs, smoke, or even alcohol but started depression medicine after years of fighting with my family.

But in the end, I promise all of you, all of you who are reading this, I will fucking break this loop & come out of this cell now, I know I might be stuck again but I will not take long to come back & fight again. I will fight not because I need money or so.

I will fight because I just don’t want to die by remaining in the loop of prison, I don’t want to die with any cheap dopamine rush, I want to die by fighting.

I want to make fighting my habit
I want to make my work my habit
I want to fear my fears
I want to die as a warrior

Thanks for reading

3 Likes
Main Disc. Thread -- Emperor Black: Twilight of the Gods (Q Module available!)
#7

Day 20 Sub Day

I am having lots of anxiety for the last few days when my family decided to separate us. I am afraid of not being able to handle the financial burden. Anxiety is too much to handle.
My wife is being very supportive in this regard which I am so grateful for.

Unable to focus on work and having panic attacks.
Feeling very weak inside.
Lack of self-discipline
trying to focus on goals but also afraid of the future outcomes
feeling weak inner self

My problem is I am having too many negative thoughts about my future & this is not 1st time I am experiencing it, It has been happening for a long time.

I have created a list of issues my wife noticed in me over the years, I asked it because I want to look my myself clearly & closely.
Not noticing any masculinity feeling more dependent on others.
A thinking lot about the future instead of being present now

Stopped seduction & other unnecessary activities
trying to build extreme self-discipline
becoming spiritual again, remembering ALLAH

All is not lost now, I know all this negativity will purge soon

#8

WashOut Day 1

Yesterday I read a lot of experience regarding Dragon Reborn my negativity is at an all-time high because I want to face my biggest fear in life without running it

taken nap, wasted time & do all things related to wasting time :frowning:
But night work for my company 2 times & I felt good

Since I stack Dragon Reborn with Emperor Black
I felt something different

I found intense focus, Like what’s happening outside of the home, It’s like my sensation has increased a lot

one of my good friends tried to go over me & I felt helpless, I tried to dominate him but I failed to understand why he was behaving that strange

In the dream I finally talked to a girl which I wanted to talk, looks like little trauma is getting released there, but from morning to now afternoon no work only wasted time

make wife my wife my accountability partner & also gave her subs to listen
I am trying to journal hourly so that I can remember most of the internal changes inside me

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#9

Washout Day 2

What are my objectives or goals to achieve with my subliminal stack…Although I read & re-read the objectives of subliminal I think more important right now is, what I want to achieve with my subliminal stack

My goal with my subliminal stack is

  1. making habit of sitting & doing my real work, My #1 issue is Procanistation & wasting time
    So I want to progress in this regard, where my goal is at least seat in front of a PC & do real work

Further Clarification
From morning 10 am to evening 10 PM
of course, 2 gym & 2 hours of college included

Let’s See How I performed yesterday
no real work I have done yesterday & just wasted a pure day not doing anything

Apart from that
resolved the property issue with my dad where I lost but I just don’t want to hurt him further

taking medicine for anxiety whenever I have a surge of anxiety

Today I have very vivid dreams, dreams about marriage, politics, sports, my dad & tv shows, etc
it was so vivid but as I woke up I & wrote it

feeling very low self esteem because of money issue but still not sitting my ass in one place is what getting me worried now

1 Like
#10

Washout Day 3

Yesterday I did 3 Pomodoro Sessions out of 16 targets which are 8 hours of work. I want to make

Back to dreams
again had very vivid dreams the one I journaled at 4 am is
“my brother & sister conspiring & little brother constructing building & few pornographic dreams”

as I am journaling & keeping logs now I am more understanding myself & recognizing most of patterns

#11

Washout Day 4

Today also I had a vivid dream about some movies etc I journaled it after waking up but it looks like random shit, so nothing important

I am trying to log my every little detail & trying to crack my own thinking pattern to break the pattern of procrastinating habit

Yesterday I have done 3 sessions with Lil break in between & did gym both of them
got a response from a girl but now I am not interested ever, fully focused on wealth

Went out with friends & gave them a party which they have been asking for a very long time. Good Quality time, But one important thing I noticed during the gym session was that “surge wave of negativity during Zumba session & all things become blank to me, I wasn’t into moment, I tried to recollect my thoughts & keep on going”

This the exact things I needed during my work, No matter how many negative thoughts I shall face, I need to keep going despite all the negativity.

My next stack must have dragon reborn now, I need this sub more than ever

1 Like
#12

Washout Day 5

Yesterday I went out with a friend & attended 2 events without any hesitation, I have become socially more strong now.

But these things are not much important to me right now, the more important things are financial freedom by removing laziness & time-wasting activities

#Dreams

Had an intense dream with an ex-crush, it may be big trauma that now is coming to the surface, I checked her handle after waking up. But these things show how much I have damaged myself emotionally in the past.

Had another intense dream where I was with my mom riding a horse & then suddenly our horse removed us & started fucking another female horse, What kind of shitty dream it was I don’t know

#Productivity

Productivity is somewhat better today but got ruined with my PMO’ed Session. I don’t know from the last few days I was horny as hell.

I need some fire within me that should keep igniting me to stay on my path of financial freedom, I hope I will achieve this with my next cycle. Which is purely based on healing, breaking financial barrier while still maintaining love within myself.