08/31
Before I continue on to chronicling the second day of usage, I suppose I should give some additional background into myself and situation.
I’m 26, live in the United States and have a girlfriend and 10 month old kid. I’m a truck driver, and even though most sub creators advise against it, I listen to my subs a bit of the time when I’m driving. I wouldn’t have time otherwise as I’m sleeping when not driving, lol.
I chose Emperor for a couple of reasons. One, is because I have limiting beliefs with money. Even more than money, I have limiting beliefs to success in career. I don’t even know what I want to do career-wise with my life or how to discover that. So I’m hoping Emperor will help with that and other things. Even though I don’t have an actual concrete idea I wanna follow with this aspect of it, I’m hoping Emperor will implant the pathways to discovery of that.
Also, my girlfriend and I want to bring other women into our relationship, to put it one way. So I’m also hoping Emperor will help towards manifestation of that as well (more a harem deal than open relationship/polygamy) but I do not know. I didn’t see StarkQ until the next day after I bought Emperor and I’m not sure if I pulled the trigger too soon, for a couple of reasons that I’ll mention later, but the relevant one now being that StarkQ seems more social and outgoing in regards to sexual things whereas Emperor seems and feels more cold, distant, and aloof. From my little experience. But yeah.
I also am looking forward to increased attention from women as well. I am an introverted extrovert, more leaning towards the former. I get anxiety around beautiful women, and communication with them is a struggle of finding things to say. It wasn’t always like this, I used to be able to converse with anyone, male or female, joke, flirt, etc etc but…
Porn addiction.
And that is the extent of my Emperor goals as of now. Very barebone.
So. 08/31, second day of listening.
Started ultrasonic at 10:40. Looped once.
5 masked loops total today.
Observations: I have been mostly reading reviews on different subs on the sub club site, and I notice that I have very little interest in binging YouTube as I usually told when we’re in colton waiting on a load.
My brain feels a kind of pressure behind my forehead and my head feels a slight ‘mush’ feeling. I think I might be slightly burned out.
I have noticed a bit of a decrease in my desire for women’s attention. It isn’t massive but it is present and noticeable.
On my third loop, I noticed my mind becoming clearer as well once again similar to yesterday when I was listening. It began subtly on the second masked loop, but became more pronounced as time went on.
I also noticed that my mind activity is a bit flat? I don’t know how to describe it other than that. Mild boosts of optimism as well. I detected pressure in my head behind the area between my eyes, as well as prickling on the top of my head. There was also facial twitching of my muscles after I finished the 3rd loop. Also, in my head I felt warmth suffusing my skull. Perhaps auric changes?
I’m a bit more apathetic towards women as I mentioned before. I’m not as forcefully drawn to check out every girl that passes by.
I do think some manifestation thing is going on because I see more women such as broken down on the side of the road, there were quite a few today to be noticeable.
As it goes with attracting women, I haven’t noticed much in that area beyond I think being eyed by the Sam’s club girl here. Just stared at, which I cannot say was attraction or curiosity. But it was a lot of looking definitely.
And another girl here at Sam’s club was just giving me lingering looks. Again, I can’t say they were ioi looks but, it was lingering.
Definitely feeling my mind smooth at and become clear and still at the 43 minute mark on this 5th listen, very pleasing!
I ended up listening 6 times masked, in addition to the ultrasonic. I’m laying down now and my head feels pressury and clogged. Might need to use tomorrow as an off day and let my mind process.
(Everything above was notes and observations I took down on my phone throughout the day, I apologize if it’s hard to read)
Observations I can recall from yesterday
•Zero desire to watch porn. At all.
•Basically no desire to binge YouTube, which is what I do when I’m in the sleeper berth after work.
•Feeling a bit more antisocial than usual. Not in the sense that I flee from human interaction but I’m content being alone, not talking to my co-driver, and just chilling. Not sure how I feel about this. Another reason why I’m not sure if I should have gone with StarkQ, but I intend to stick to Emperor for awhile.
•Neutral emotions. Which is fine by me actually, usually they’re a bit tumultuous for no reason. But with that comes me noticing that I have next to me desire to talk to any female, including my gf. Not sure where that’s coming from.
•Increased productivity. I have an 11hr drive clock for each day, and I generally drive to a bit above 10 hours of that time. I didn’t exactly drive more than I usually do, but the mental effort of doing so was NOTICEABLY lessened. To explain, I don’t normally get ‘tired’ while driving, though it has happened. What usually happens is that I get bored of it and wanna stop to surf YouTube or something.
That didn’t happen yesterday, which was awesome.
•I detect slightly more increased levels of respect from people I encounter.
And that’s basically it for now!
I hope my contribution to this category is going to be useful, lol.